Monday morning joke

[ybnorml]

Three men were sitting around bragging about how they had given their new wives duties. The first man had married a Catholic woman and bragged that he had told his wife she was to do all the dishes and house cleaning that needed doing at their house. He said it took a couple days, but on the third day he came home to a clean house and the dishes were all washed and put away.

The second man had married a Mormon woman. He bragged that he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, the dishes and the cooking. He told them the first day he didn't see any results, but the next day it was better. By the third day, the house was clean, the dishes were done, and he had a huge dinner on the table.

The third man had married a Jewish woman. He boasted that he told her that her duties were to keep the house clean, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry done and hot meals on the table, every day.

He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye.

[RonBou]

Here's another...


Army Veteran
 
 
An 83 year old Army Veteran arrived in Paris by plane. As he was fumbling in his bag for his passport, a stern French customs agent asked if he had been to France before. He admitted that he had indeed been here previously. The lady sarcastically said, “Then you should know to have your passport out and ready, Sir.”
The gentleman said “I didn’t have to show it last time.”
“Impossible!” the customs agent exclaimed. “All foreigners have always had to show a passport to enter the country.”
The man responded in a low tone, “Well, when I came ashore on the beach on D-Day in 1944, I couldn’t find any damn Frenchmen to show it to!”