Jeff K
|
 |
« on: February 18, 2010, 03:40:19 PM » |
|
Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic Stimulus' payment.
This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by Using a Q & A format: Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ? A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. Q.. Where will the government get this money ? A. From taxpayers. Q.. So the government is giving me back my own money ? A. Only a smidgen of it. Q. What is the purpose of this payment ? A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a High-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy. Q.. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ? A. Shut up. Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. Economy by Spending your stimulus check wisely: * If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will Go to China or Sri Lanka . * If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs. * If you purchase a computer, it will go to India , Taiwan or China . * If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico , Honduras and Guatemala . * If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea .
* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan . * If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go To management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. Instead, keep the money in America by: 1) Spending it at yard sales, or 2) Going to ball games, or 3) Spending it on prostitutes, or 4) Beer or 5) Tattoos. (These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )
Conclusion: Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard Sale and drink beer all day !
No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Stanley Steamer
|
 |
« Reply #1 on: February 18, 2010, 03:54:31 PM » |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
Stanley "Steamer" "Ride Hard or Stay Home" 
|
|
|
Challenger
|
 |
« Reply #2 on: February 18, 2010, 04:31:20 PM » |
|
Indra Krishnamurthy Nooyi (chairwoman of Pepsi Cola) Thanks you
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Psychotic Bovine
|
 |
« Reply #3 on: February 18, 2010, 05:21:54 PM » |
|
I vote to spend it on guns. Still a lot of awesome firearms made in the ol' US of A.
|
|
|
Logged
|
"I aim to misbehave."
|
|
|
Stanley Steamer
|
 |
« Reply #4 on: February 18, 2010, 05:34:02 PM » |
|
Indra Krishnamurthy Nooyi (chairwoman of Pepsi Cola) Thanks you
From Lower LA??...... 
|
|
|
Logged
|
Stanley "Steamer" "Ride Hard or Stay Home" 
|
|
|
Piper
|
 |
« Reply #5 on: February 19, 2010, 12:09:39 AM » |
|
I vote to spend it on guns. Still a lot of awesome firearms made in the ol' US of A.
I'd spend it on ammo for the guns that I have. If only I could find any......
|
|
|
Logged
|
~ / And it's whispered that soon, if we all call the tune 0/// Then the piper will lead us to reason <|o> And a new day will dawn for those who stand long /_\ And the forest will echo with laughter | \
|
|
|
lee
|
 |
« Reply #6 on: February 19, 2010, 04:23:12 AM » |
|
I can't remember: Who is it that owns the horses that pull the big beer wagon now?
|
|
|
Logged
|
Time is not what is taken but what remains. C. Drewry 
|
|
|
SANDMAN5
Member
    
Posts: 2176
Mileage 65875
East TN
|
 |
« Reply #7 on: February 19, 2010, 05:42:01 AM » |
|
I can't remember: Who is it that owns the horses that pull the big beer wagon now? Ain't it a Belgian company?
|
|
|
Logged
|
"Evolution" is a dying religion being kept alive with tax dollars. 
|
|
|
Beast03
Member
    
Posts: 59
Beast
Casper, Wyoming
|
 |
« Reply #8 on: February 19, 2010, 05:46:02 AM » |
|
Guns and Ammo sounds good to me! 
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|