R J
Member
Posts: 13380
DS-0009 ...... # 173
Des Moines, IA
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« on: March 19, 2010, 01:42:39 PM » |
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A guy goes hunting and stopped to take a leak. Just then a gust of wind
blew, the gun fell over and discharged shooting himself in the genitals.
Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was approached by his
doctor. "Well sir, I have some good news and some bad news. The good
news is that you are going to be OK. The damage was local to your groin,
there was very little internal damage and we were able to remove all of
the buckshot."
"What's the bad news?" asked the hunter.
"The bad news is that there was some pretty extensive buckshot damage
done to your penis which left quite a few holes in it. I'm going to have
to refer you to my sister."
"Well I guess that isn't too bad," the hunter replied. "Is your sister a
plastic surgeon?"
"Not exactly," answered the doctor. "She's a flute player in the West
Virginia Symphony Orchestra. She's going to teach you where to put your
fingers so you don't pee in your eye."
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Jack
Member
Posts: 1889
VRCC# 3099, 1999 Valk Standard, 2006 Rocket 3
Benton, Arkansas
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« Reply #1 on: March 19, 2010, 01:50:12 PM » |
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ROFLMAO!  |
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"It takes a certain kind of nut to ride a motorcycle, and I am that motorcycle nut," Lyle Grimes, RIP August 2009.   |
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Michael K (Az.)
Member
Posts: 2471
"You have to admire a healthy tomatillo!"
Glendale, AZ
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« Reply #2 on: March 19, 2010, 03:55:27 PM » |
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"I'd never join a club that would have me as a member!" G.Marx  |
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Whistler
Member
Posts: 1234
Kansas VRCC State Rep., Formerly known as EngEmt
North Newton, Kansas
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« Reply #3 on: March 19, 2010, 04:12:11 PM » |
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Thanks RJ needed the laugh today! JDW
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John Schmidt
Member
Posts: 15223
a/k/a Stuffy. '99 I/S Valk Roadsmith Trike
De Pere, WI (Green Bay)
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« Reply #4 on: March 19, 2010, 04:33:38 PM » |
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A big game hunter had to go to the dentist, who informed him the tooth was abscessed and had to be pulled, whereby the hunter agreed to the procedure. A moment later the dentist comes at him with a needle and the hunter asked what it was for, and was told it's to deaden the pain of pulling the tooth. He informed the dr. he can take the pain, so the dr. set about pulling the tooth, causing a few beads of sweat to appear on the hunter's forehead. Afterward the dr. said that must have been the worst pain ever, hunter said no...the worst was when I was out hunting once. I felt the call of nature so hunkered down next to a tree, not realizing there was a bear trap immediately beneath me. Soon as I relieved myself, it sprung the bear trap, which snapped shut on my genitals. The dr. said that must have been the worst pain ever, the hunter said no...not when the trap snapped shut. It was when I came to the end of the chain.  |
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GreenLantern57
Member
Posts: 1543
Hail to the king baby!
Rock Hill, SC
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« Reply #5 on: March 19, 2010, 08:36:47 PM » |
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ohhh, (hee, hee) ouch, (snork), GROANnnnn, ROGLMAO  |
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Ratdog
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« Reply #6 on: March 19, 2010, 09:26:59 PM » |
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Make yourselves sheep, and the wolves will eat you. - Benjamin Franklin. If it ain't Zesty, it's only a two-tone.  |
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Ratdog
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« Reply #7 on: March 19, 2010, 09:28:37 PM » |
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She's going to teach you where to put your
fingers so you don't pee in your eye."
Groan....  It was probably even more gooder before ya sanitized it.  |
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Make yourselves sheep, and the wolves will eat you. - Benjamin Franklin. If it ain't Zesty, it's only a two-tone. |
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PharmBoy
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« Reply #8 on: March 20, 2010, 02:00:34 PM » |
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Guys, I'll sure be glad when it quits snowing here and it warms up again.....JTL |
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A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. ~Texas Guinan
4th Infantry Tet Vet
99 Interstate
97 Bumble Bee
97 Red & White
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