Humor in Uniform 8/4/2010

[R J]

8/4/2010
During the preparation for Operation Desert Storm, I had to make sure the entire crew received immunizations.   Our commanding officer, a macho guy, was the most difficult to get to Sick Bay.   He finally showed up late on Friday afternoon.  I explained to him that the shots might make him slightly feverish and cranky.  “I’ll come back on Monday, then,” he replied.  “Why?” I asked.  Would you rather be irritable to the crew or your wife?” “Doc,” he declared, “I’m not afraid of the crew.”
Davis L King

[Jess from VA]

I had just rotated home (to 15AF/March AFB CA) after two short tours in Turkey (the second, Incerlik AB, where most of the northern Iraq flight missions later originated in Gulf #1).  Only a few months after my return, Desert Shield was initiated.  

Because I was on the 15AF mobility team, I was ordered along with everyone else, to immediately get all my shots updated, including shots for deployment to Iraq.  So at O'dark thirty the next morning, some 40 of us are lined up at the base hospital.  I'm first, and hand over my shot record, and the nurse says "Sir, almost all your shots are expired, including DPT, malaria, yellow fever, cholera.... plus the ones you need for Iraq."  Normally, these shots are deliberately spread out over a period of weeks to avoid major reactions, but the whole mobility team had to be ready to deploy instantly, so that was out.  I ponied up both sleeves on my BDUs and got about ten shots.  I was told "don't go anywhere for a little while." And I replied "OK, I'll just sit down here for a few minutes."

Next thing I knew, I was hearing thousands of birds tweeting away (really loud tinnitus), and I was laying on the floor slobbering on myself, with med techs standing over me asking if I'm OK (except I couldn't understand what they were saying).  Two guys in white lifted me up from the floor, and walk/dragged me back into an ER room to get me out of sight of the others saying "Sir, you are setting a bad example for the others."  I am later told the "others" began loudly protesting having to get multiple doses of toxic vaccine all at once.  The medicos gave me OJ and crackers and commenced blaming me for the "incident"...."you must have needle aversion" or something.  I said, no I don't, it's just that when so many doses of vaccine hit my heart all at the same time, it knocked me out.

I felt better in about an hour, and all was well other than very sore arms.  Of course, the story got back to HQ, and I got called a pussy by a plethora of senior officers, and I good naturedly replied "heck sir, why don't you go down and get a dozen immunizations and see how it goes for you?"   There weren't any takers.  

Of course the 15AF mobility team never deployed (since we were SAC and nukes were not part of the strike package in that particular war).  

[sugerbear]

thanks RJ always enjoy your post.

and Jess

i worked for a pain management doc or a few yrs. we had a Mo state patrol come in for neck pain.
he was a very large broad guy(6'4" 275). he would lay down on the stretcher, i'd wave a needle at him and he would pass out!! i told him if he ever stopped me i'd tell everybody at troop "c" the he was wimp and why.
had a great laugh about that every time he came in.

[Jess from VA]

My dad went thru old time USMC basic at Paris Island in 1950.  He told the story of the guy just ahead of him alphabetically all thru basic who was a very tough customer, but who passed out every time shots were given.  As soon as they'd line up, he'd turn around and quietly ask my dad to catch him when he got his shot..... so he didn't smack his head on the floor. 

I don't know anyone (but a heroin addict) who loves needles,  but I never had a needle aversion.   

[R J]

I was at the USMC Recruit Depot in San Diego in 1950, January type like.

Had a big dude, played football for some town in the South, I don't even remember the state, well I do, but I  ain't tellin.

Needles prettified him.

When we got our shots to go to Korea, he passed out on the 1st shot, the CO had an orderly cart already there, he passed out, 3 of us loaded him on the cart and we pushed him through the 50' hanger so he could get his shots.

For some reason or another needles never bothered me until I got shots to go back to Korea for the 2nd tour.    I could not raise my arms for a couple of weeks.   Kind of like they are acting right now and no one knows what is the problem.     So, guess what, I get to go to an Ortho surgeon for diagnosis.
I'm going to remind him of this when I get my appointment.   Damn, it would be nice if it was something that simple, and fixable......

[Jess from VA]

Just go to the Doc and get it looked at RJ..... they'll fix you right up. 

[skromfols]

I'm 6'3" and 220 lbs, so not a small person, however, I have an aversion to needles.  After passing out numerous times I finally concluded it was smarter to let whoever it was know that I needed to sit down or lie down before getting a shot or giving a blood sample.  It's saved me some bumps and bruises, although it's tough on the ego.

[R J]

Just go to the Doc and get it looked at RJ..... they'll fix you right up. 

Jess, I been going to the Dr on these shoulders for the past 4 years....    I think they have done almost every test they can do that Insurance will pay for, some of them twice and a couple like yesterday for the 3rd time.

Naw, I ain't given up, but it sure is gettin aggravating......

[Jess from VA]

Sorry buddy, I was just trying to be upbeat. 

Truth is, doctoring is only part science...... and the other part is BS and voodoo.

Do you have one of those whirlpool tubs, or hot tub/jacuzzi?  May not cure the underlying conditions, but it can sure make you feel better (sleep better too).

[R J]

Sorry buddy, I was just trying to be upbeat. 

Truth is, doctoring is only part science...... and the other part is BS and voodoo.

Do you have one of those whirlpool tubs, or hot tub/jacuzzi?  May not cure the underlying conditions, but it can sure make you feel better (sleep better too).

I been thinking about taking 1 shower out and putting a Jacuzzi in it's place.

About once every 3 or 4 weeks I go up to the HI and rent a Jacuzzi room for the night and just almost stay in it till morning.     Yupper, it sure do feel good, but only for like an hour after I get out.