Geriatric Humor

[DIGGER]

Its wierd being the same age as old people

Life is like a helicopter....I dont know how to operate a helicopter

Chocolate is Gods way of telling us he likes us a little bit chubby

I see people my age climbing mountains... I feel good just getting my leg through my underwear without losing my balance

I dont always go the extra mile...when I do its because I missed my exit

You dont realize how old you are till you sit on the floor then try to get back up

We all get heavier as we get older, because there is a lot more information in our heads.  Thats my story and I’m sticking to it.

[DDT (12)]

Digger,

All of those seem quite reasonable to me... strike very close to home, too!!! The thought of me being the same age as old people still furrows my brow in bewilderment, too! Thanks for the grin; comes in handy on this cloudy, soon to be drizzly day here...

DDT

[Jess from VA]

Its weird being the same age as old people.

Bruce beat me to it.

This is humor for sure, but it is also truth.  

Except for the few physical reminders of advancing age, and looking in the mirror from time to time, my mind is the same one I've always had, and my thoughts and perceptions are mostly the same as they've always been.  I don't go around thinking I'm old (or young), and I don't act or speak old.  I rarely remember to ask if there is an age (or veteran) discount in stores.  And my memory (so far) is entirely unimpaired.

I look out my window and see an older couple out walking their dogs.  I know they're older by looking at them, but if I think about it, I realize, hell I'm certainly older than they are.  When did that happen?

I'm fully at peace and harmony with my age, but it's kind of a surprise from time to time.

[Rams]

Life is like navigating cross country using a terrain map at night,  there are clues everywhere but, one must know what to look for and stay alert to the dangers right there in front of you.  You’d think that age and experience would help develop some judgment resulting in better decision making.    Not always true in my case.   
Been there, done that too many times.

Rams

[old2soon]

       WHEN zackly did down git so far away?  Sometimes my arms ain't long enough to read the menu! Every morning I wake up now IS a surprise. I look in the obits and see folks younger than me passing this life. I try hard to NOT complain about the pain(s). FEELING pain lets me Know I are Still alive. I have sat upon the ground or garage floor and given great thought to standing up again. Seems like it takes FAR longer these days to git back to standing. When did Doctors and Nurses become so young? When did a 15 year old automobile or a 22 year old Valkyrie Not seem That old? That very Fact I still LOVE to ride makes me NOT fear age as much.  RIDE SAFE.

[scooperhsd]

       WHEN zackly did down git so far away?  Sometimes my arms ain't long enough to read the menu! Every morning I wake up now IS a surprise. I look in the obits and see folks younger than me passing this life. I try hard to NOT complain about the pain(s). FEELING pain lets me Know I are Still alive. I have sat upon the ground or garage floor and given great thought to standing up again. Seems like it takes FAR longer these days to git back to standing. When did Doctors and Nurses become so young? When did a 15 year old automobile or a 22 year old Valkyrie Not seem That old? That very Fact I still LOVE to ride makes me NOT fear age as much.  RIDE SAFE.

That's what bifocals are for

[DIGGER]

       WHEN zackly did down git so far away?  Sometimes my arms ain't long enough to read the menu! Every morning I wake up now IS a surprise. I look in the obits and see folks younger than me passing this life. I try hard to NOT complain about the pain(s). FEELING pain lets me Know I are Still alive. I have sat upon the ground or garage floor and given great thought to standing up again. Seems like it takes FAR longer these days to git back to standing. When did Doctors and Nurses become so young? When did a 15 year old automobile or a 22 year old Valkyrie Not seem That old? That very Fact I still LOVE to ride makes me NOT fear age as much.  RIDE SAFE.

You are right about the 22 try old Valkyrie not seeming that old.    I'm 70 and got my first motorcycle ar 14 and been riding ever since.   I've never kept a motorcycle this long    I have no desire to buy a new motorcycle    
I'll just keep fixing my 2001 Valkyrie.    I have spent over 3 thousand dollars this yr on repairs (half the value of the bike) on tires, brakes, wheel bearings, neutral switch, and a few more items.    I Probly got 10 yrs or less to ride and my Valkyrie will fulfill my needs till then .   Wife wants me to get a new bike but I'm gonna stay with what flips my dipper.

[old2soon]

          Maint is just part of the cost of the FUN!  This is also the longest time I have kept one Motorcycle. I'll be 76 in Feb 2021. It amuses me Greatly at times that I'm still suckin wind. RIDE SAFE.

[0leman]

Some claim that as we get older, we have problems recalling things. 

Really its a data retrieval issue.  Like a computer that has has lots of data in it takes time to find the right answer to the question.  So its not that we can't remember things, its that we have lots of data in our heads from years of cramming it in.  So it a wonder that we can remember anything.

[John Schmidt]

Like my dad, who passed at 93, used to say; "just think of everything I've seen, heard, or done, and how much I have to remember. And you wonder why I get tired just thinking about it?" At this point I'm closer to 85 than 80 and also amazed with the fact I'm still plugging along. I'm with O2S, but look at it from a different angle; when did getting UP get so far away? Kinda like parking a heavy bike without reverse, you get in the habit of watching how you park your butt when working at floor level. I always make sure I have a stool or something handy to grab in case I need a hand, although most of the time I manage without...so far. I rode my Tourer a fair amount this past year but there were times I felt a little uneasy while on it so decided to look for a trike. At least with the trike I won't have to worry about dropping it.

I find it amusing when I go to the gym, I've had any number of younger guys casually ask questions that tells me they're trying to find out how old I am. I don't share that unless they come right out and ask, and I don't mind telling them....just a little cat & mouse game. One little gal always gives my arm a squeeze as she walks by and greets me with a "hi pops" which kinda "warms the cockles o' me heart." As for memory, I have no trouble remembering what is needed w/o trouble(so far), hearing is better than many 1/3 my age....always has been, aches and pains I've grown to accept for the most part due to past injuries and wear from the years of service. Still have a full head of hair although getting a bit thin at the crown...but who like fat hair? I'm just thankful I'm still here, for how much longer I'll not question...just plan to be ready. Until that time, I'll continue enjoying life as health allows. Just so you'll know, since losing my Rita last year it's been difficult emotionally. However, I've found a new love....a pretty little blonde that has stolen my heart. She'll be 4 months old in a few days, great grandchild(daughter) #13 named Lucy. Already showing some personality, I see a bit of her grandmother in her(oh my!). Her mother, now 28, will have her hands full and I can't wait to see all that unfold.