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Author Topic: Deep thughts for 2010  (Read 1281 times)
Doc Moose
Member
*****
Posts: 748


VRCC#506 - VRCCDS#0002 - BOTS

W. Indyanner / Central Florida


« on: December 28, 2009, 03:34:43 PM »

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game"

When we are already there?

10. Why are they called " stands" when they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

12.. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

13... Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

17... If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21... Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control

When you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25... Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

27.Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?

28. Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway ?

 Cheesy    Cheesy    Cheesy    Cheesy    Cheesy    Cheesy    Cheesy    Cheesy    Cheesy    Cheesy    Cheesy
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    Retired OF - Everyday is Saturday!
GW/Roadsmith Trike
Oss
Member
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Posts: 12615


The lower Hudson Valley

Ossining NY Chapter Rep VRCCDS0141


WWW
« Reply #1 on: December 28, 2009, 04:35:58 PM »

Dang it Doc  now I will be up all night

Are most of those Steve Wright one liners?
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If you don't know where your going any road will take you there
George Harrison

When you come to the fork in the road, take it
Yogi Berra   (Don't send it to me C.O.D.)
Dogg
Member
*****
Posts: 1216


Berlin Md


« Reply #2 on: December 28, 2009, 05:13:47 PM »

steven wright omg...."I woe up this morning to find all my furniture had been stolen......and replaced with exact replicas...
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alph
Member
*****
Posts: 5513


Eau Claire, WI.


« Reply #3 on: December 28, 2009, 05:52:07 PM »

i give up,  why?
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Promote world peace, ban all religion.

Ride Safe, Ride Often!!  cooldude
BF
Member
*****
Posts: 9932


Fort Walton Beach, Florida I'm a simple man, I like pretty, dark haired woman and breakfast food.


« Reply #4 on: December 28, 2009, 07:53:43 PM »

Why do they call them apartments....when they're all together. 
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I can't help about the shape I'm in
I can't sing, I ain't pretty and my legs are thin
But don't ask me what I think of you
I might not give the answer that you want me to
 

MAD6Gun
Member
*****
Posts: 2636


New Haven IN


« Reply #5 on: December 29, 2009, 03:11:31 PM »

 Why do they call them "buildings" when they are already built. They should be called "Builts"...
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