John Schmidt
Member
Posts: 15208
a/k/a Stuffy. '99 I/S Valk Roadsmith Trike
De Pere, WI (Green Bay)
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« on: May 16, 2022, 08:38:09 AM » |
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I lost my Rita three years ago this coming Friday. Emotionally it was quite a load to bear, also having to move out of my home in the weeks that follwed. I had no intentions of remarrying, still don't, and most definitely wasn't searching. I found a church home a couple years ago and thought I knew most members by familiarity of the faces if not by name, and have developed a few friends as a result. Then out of the blue one Sunday I notice a new face, turned out she wasn't new to the congregation, but had been away plus stuck at home during the recent pandemic. When I saw her going to different ladies and the way they all carried on I knew she wasn't new to the scene. What kinda bothered me was the fact that I "noticed" her, I found out later she experienced the same thing. She lost her husband eight yrs. ago and also wasn't looking, neither of us had dated or had any "interests" of that nature. Over the following couple months, it became evident that there was a common interest in each other and one Sunday after church we ended up talking in the parking lot for quite some time...actually didn't realize for how long until she happened to look at her watch. As it has turned out, we're quite comfortable with each other's company. We have no desire to remarry, or to have another caretaker job, but simply enjoy doing stuff together. We're both in our 80's, she's younger but is quite active and energetic. We don't need each other for financial security either, that can be a real deal breaker. A few years back she injured her left knee in a skiing accident and now it has become quite a problem for her and needs replacing. It's bone on bone and is slightly misshapened so is thinking maybe pursuing it in the winter. The amusing part is she has a number of lady friends and has told a couple of them she's spending time with a new male friend. She relates to me how they ask all sorts of questions about me, what we do, where we went...the usual stuff. She just laughs it off, told me it's "so 7th grade" the way they're acting. Where will it lead...we have no idea. But for now we're simply enjoying having someone to spend time with, do things with, talk to, etc., and I can only assume eventually someone to hold and be held. She & I both agreed there will be no other "physical" connections due to our spiritual beliefs, not any physical limitations. That's the other thing that's quite strong between us...our beliefs. So for now, we're simply enjoying each other, for however long we're given and will be thankful for that time. I hope I haven't bored you folks, just wanted to share with the "family."  |
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Jess from VA
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« Reply #1 on: May 16, 2022, 09:12:13 AM » |
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Friends are hard to come by.  Gender is not that important. Good for you (and her). (Keep your hand off her bad knee.  ) |
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TJ
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« Reply #2 on: May 16, 2022, 09:15:41 AM » |
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old2soon
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« Reply #3 on: May 16, 2022, 09:37:55 AM » |
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GOD in His Infinite WISDOM put you two in each others path. And sounds like to me anywho Both y'all seem Happy with what has transpired! Sides as my Dad was fond of sayin-we ain't gittin no younger!  Good on both of yuz! RIDE SAFE. She gits knee replaced wants to go skiing again and wants You to come alomg?  |
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Today is the tommorow you worried about yesterday. If at first you don't succeed screw it-save it for nite check. 1964 1968 U S Navy. Two cruises off Nam.
VRCCDS0240 2012 GL1800 Gold Wing Motor Trike conversion
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« Reply #4 on: May 16, 2022, 09:39:26 AM » |
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scooperhsd
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« Reply #5 on: May 16, 2022, 10:01:11 AM » |
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Start a relationship - it will be good for both of you. Best of luck with her.
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f6john
Member
Posts: 9339
Christ first and always
Richmond, Kentucky
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« Reply #6 on: May 16, 2022, 10:09:26 AM » |
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Well,,I’m shocked!!! Not really, I found you to be very outgoing and engaging and church is an excellent place to find and develop new friends. But you know, without pics, it didn’t happen.  Just kidding, but a picture of her on the trike would be cool |
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carolinarider09
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« Reply #7 on: May 16, 2022, 10:34:46 AM » |
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An inspiration for me. Thanks for telling the story. I hope you and she have many happy days ahead.
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Rams
Member
Posts: 16189
So many colors to choose from yet so few stand out
Covington, TN
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« Reply #8 on: May 16, 2022, 10:37:45 AM » |
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But you know, without pics, it didn’t happen. Just kidding, but a picture of her on the trike would be cool Whole heartedly agree. IMHO, getting her on that trike and riding would be the same as getting to third base. Getting her in the front seat would be a home run................ Good on you and her..  Rams |
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VRCC# 29981
Learning the majority of life's lessons the hard way.
Every trip is an adventure, enjoy it while it lasts.
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Valkorado
Member
Posts: 10491
VRCC DS 0242
Gunnison, Colorado (7,703') Here there be twisties.
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« Reply #9 on: May 16, 2022, 12:25:55 PM » |
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Enjoy her company John.
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Have you ever noticed when you're feeling really good, there's always a pigeon that'll come sh!t on your hood? - John Prine 97 Tourer "Silver Bullet" 01 Interstate "Ruby"  |
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DDT (12)
Member
Posts: 4112
Sometimes ya just gotta go...
Winter Springs, FL - Occasionally...
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« Reply #10 on: May 16, 2022, 05:06:27 PM » |
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John,
Congrats, my friend! I'm truly happy for you...
DDT
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Don't just dream it... LIVE IT!
See ya down the road...
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JimC
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« Reply #11 on: May 16, 2022, 06:57:15 PM » |
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Good for you John, I hope it continues to be a fun relationship, sounds like you are good for each other.
Jim
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Jim Callaghan SE Wisconsin
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Jack B
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« Reply #12 on: May 16, 2022, 07:19:11 PM » |
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Good for you John
Sounds like she makes you happy
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Let’s RIDE
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Jersey mike
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« Reply #13 on: May 17, 2022, 04:36:13 AM » |
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As well, good for you…and her. Enjoy each other. Spend time together. Be friends. Let nature take its course, it will certainly put a little pep in your step to be able to have a fresh new relationship with the future not yet written.
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cookiedough
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« Reply #14 on: May 17, 2022, 05:22:12 AM » |
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give her a ride on the trike, you will have made a friend for life.. male or female doesn't matter, but is nice to have just a few close friends to chat with I guess. Just not too many for if have too many, they ask for too much or they bug you too much at the least convenient times stopping on over. |
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3fan4life
Member
Posts: 6958
Any day that you ride is a good day!
Moneta, VA
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« Reply #15 on: May 17, 2022, 06:40:24 AM » |
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Good for you John! God wants us to be happy and he never puts someone into our lives by coincidence. |
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1 Corinthians 1:18  |
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_Sheffjs_
Member
Posts: 5613
Jerry & Sherry Sheffer
Sarasota FL
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« Reply #16 on: May 19, 2022, 05:52:24 PM » |
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John, enjoy your self sir! That is an order. |
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John Schmidt
Member
Posts: 15208
a/k/a Stuffy. '99 I/S Valk Roadsmith Trike
De Pere, WI (Green Bay)
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« Reply #17 on: May 19, 2022, 06:15:51 PM » |
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John, enjoy your self sir! That is an order. Jerry, it's easy to do with this lady. At first I worried it may be a rebound thing for me, but once I thought about it the less that made sense. If it had been three months...then yes. But this Friday(5/20) is three years and I've moved on in many ways...developed a new and different independent lifestyle, daily routine(albeit boring at times), it's different yet comfortable. Then one Sunday a passing introduction occured and in the weeks that followed, it all just seemed to come together for us. We're pleased with it. |
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Farside
Member
Posts: 2543
Let's get going!
Milton,FL
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« Reply #18 on: May 20, 2022, 07:12:22 AM » |
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Great story John. I'm happy for you and to know you all met at church even better. Your situation reminds me of what my mom developed with her friend Harry. Both are 84 now and have been together for 6 years. Both enjoy each others company but she doesn't want to marry inspite of him wanting too. She bought a house and has moved to Macon, GA to be closer to him after 6 years. She was just north of Valdosta. I like Harry, he is a good guy and they are happy. You two enjoy life with each other company and prayers for her knee issues. 
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Farside
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thedon
Administrator
Member
Posts: 511
Wisconsin State Rep.
Watertown Wisconsin
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« Reply #19 on: May 20, 2022, 09:23:35 AM » |
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Good for you John. That is awesome. Nice having someone you can talk with.
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Charlie McCready
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« Reply #20 on: May 20, 2022, 10:01:20 AM » |
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John, this is absolutely great !! It all sounds like a perfect situation. You and she have earned each others company. Be happy my friend !!
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flsix
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« Reply #21 on: May 20, 2022, 05:29:09 PM » |
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That's great John, I'm happy for both of you. Sounds like she's going to be a blessing in your life. Have you mentioned you ride a motorcycle? Just curious about her reaction.
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2013 F6B
ESCHEW OBFUSCATION
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John Schmidt
Member
Posts: 15208
a/k/a Stuffy. '99 I/S Valk Roadsmith Trike
De Pere, WI (Green Bay)
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« Reply #22 on: May 21, 2022, 09:24:30 AM » |
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That's great John, I'm happy for both of you. Sounds like she's going to be a blessing in your life. Have you mentioned you ride a motorcycle? Just curious about her reaction.
Jeff, she knew that long before we ever made personal contact. The pastor's parents, retired from the ministry, attend the same church and Nancy is long time friends with the pastor's mother...who knows more about me than I first thought.  In fact, she kinda acted as a match-maker quietly behind the scene. I had lunched with the parents a number of times, and had met the dad for b'fast or lunch a few times...we're within 5 months of being the same age(I'm the elder). Nancy has been to my place a couple times when weather didn't afford us a chance to be outside...happens a lot up here. When she first walked in, she looked around, laughed, then said..."yup, definitley a guys place." The relationship seems to grow with each contact where we spend time together...not just time on the phone. I'm enjoying it and it appears to be sincerely mutual. As for the trike, she's impatiently waiting for a ride but might have to wait until I return from IZ. |
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larue
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« Reply #23 on: May 21, 2022, 10:05:45 AM » |
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After all you’ve been through, it’s refreshing to see you happy with new company. Good for you buddy
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Robert
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« Reply #25 on: May 22, 2022, 04:49:25 AM » |
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I'm glad to hear it John, My wife and I would get a big laugh each time we saw one of the elder members of my church come in with his new fling and be laughing and like kids together. Hope this turns out to be a real blessing for you. |
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« Last Edit: May 22, 2022, 05:49:25 AM by Robert »
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“Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don’t have time for all that.”
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WoodyFL
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« Reply #26 on: May 22, 2022, 10:45:14 AM » |
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Hard to believe that it's been 3 years!
I agree with everyone else, she sounds like she could definitely be a great friend!!
Bob
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2000 Blue/Silver I/S
Ocoee, FL
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