Walking adventures

[Jess from VA]

As reported before, I go 2-3 miles every morning, all around my large neighborhood.

I like (and can't lay off) my morning coffee, so I have picked routes that give me a private spot to take a leak around midway through the walk (there's only 2).   

So I cross the street into a wooded entrance to a little park, and there's this old hag picking up trash and moving deadwood around.  One of those persons that has never stopped wearing a mask outdoors long after covid (and pollen), and all alone in the woods with the squirrels.

Pardon me madam, but this is the only spot this old man can take a pee (pointing to a giant oak tree 30 feet away) on my daily walks.  Behind it, I would be invisible to her.

Well then perhaps you should wear a diaper (as unfriendly as can be).

I don't need a diaper ma'am, just a few seconds in the woods will do. (I refrained from saying.. a diaper, you mean like you wear on your face??).

This isn't a public toilet you know, and it's probably illegal too.

All the woods on the planet are a public toilet madam, and I can assure you that in private, it's no offense in the Commonwealth of Virginia.

But there's no arguing with her and I won't take a chance with some kind of official complaint, so I tell her to have a nice day... and double time to spot number 2.

What a thoroughly unpleasant person 

[scooperhsd]

Our nearest park is 1/4 mile, then it has a concrete path that the county has a bathhouse (closed at the moment due to vandalism, but they have rented a portable one for now) about halfway around. Even so - I prefer to use the facilities before I leave (just in case). I also want to not freeze my tailend off ... so I go in the "warm" part of the day.

[Oss]

try having the coffee AFTER the walk

problem solved

no charge

[Jess from VA]

I would need to go with no coffee at all Evan.  I've skipped coffee with no improvement.

I go outside in my backyard right before I leave, and I always need to on the walk of 40-50 minutes.

In all my day rides, I have spots picked out along the way to go as well (all outdoors) (the few porta-cans out there are disgusting sh!t houses full of flies and rarely cleaned, if ever).

Such is my life.  It's not that bad, and I do routinely limit fluids before travel.

Sorry for the distasteful topic.   

[da prez]

   JESS , you are not alone. I have a drinking problem also. I consume morning coffee and a gallon of H2O daily. when it's time to go , it's time to go.  I am far from bashful , but cautious. To many preverts (pervert in training) around. 
 

                                                       da prez

[Oldfishguy]

Ummmm.  I don’t think I would have even asked the gal; I would have just kept moving on down the trail.  Folks like that may have a tendency to talk to neighbors and such and don’t have much to talk about, so one doesn’t want to give them a story to tell.

I live rurally but still go for most daily walks at a county park a few miles away.  I tend to walk alone and listen to music on a headset and drift off and just think.   Occasionally I’ll meet someone on a remote trail and I’ll just pass with my head down and a simple wave (especially if it is a gal walking alone).  And no one picks a conversation with me either as I’m sure I look a bit disheveled in an old canvas field coat and an Army embroidered tassel hat.  

Maybe, it may be worth driving a few miles to a more remote location.  Here is my park map (roughly 250 acre’s) I have drawn from scratch with names I have added over the years.

[f6john]

I’ll say one thing, we are an interesting bunch.

[Rams]

Ummmm.  I don’t think I would have even asked the gal; I would have just kept moving on down the trail.  

Whole heartedly agree.   I'm not against urinating out in the woods at all but, I would have just found a different (private) spot to go.  

I'm one of those people that if outside in my yard and need to go, I'll do what i need to do but, I don't have a problem with neighbors observing due to the positions of their homes to mine although, I will get the "Stink Eye" from my ever-loving spouse if she happens to observe me.  

Rams

[Jess from VA]

I don’t think I would have even asked the gal; I would have just kept moving on down the trail.

The problem is, that little backdoor wooded park entrance just goes up a little hill into a wide open area often occupied by people.  I felt I had to ask to go only 20-30 feet away from her.  You'd think older folks would understand, but I've seen her working in that bramble before, and she is obviously a strange bird to be avoided.

That area you walk looks great (compared to mine), and with funny names (Heart attack hill, Suicide hill, Cult outreach HQ).  

There are places I could drive for nicer environs than my neighborhood, but my area is largely suburbia and there will always be the issue of need to pee and place to do so without offending anyone, and I don't really want to burn gas and take more of my day (every day) getting the miles in.  

I see other walkers listening to music or using the earplug phone talking away to someone.

The other phenomenon on my walks is the large number of homeowners who own dogs who never apparently walk them (some do), and when you walk by, they bark at you because they want to go walking around too.  I'm not a fan of barking dogs, but I understand.  We have leash laws and it's a good thing because there are a good number of huge rottweilers and dobermans and pit bull terriers I don't think I could outrun (for long).     But the breed I detest above all is Chihuahuas (often in pairs) who all are excitable little bastards who will bite if they get a chance.  I always give way to dog walkers and go in the street to pass.

Post morning walk edit:  Well the dingbat wasn't there this morning, but I discovered she'd put a big pile of deadwood behind my tree.  I threw it all back in the woods.  I'm going to make a small wooden sign that says "Public Toilet" and nail it to the tree high enough she can't reach it.  With any luck her head will explode.  

[Willow]

...
What a thoroughly unpleasant person 

LOL!  I'm sure she thought much the same.  She doesn't have an easy option to piss outdoors and probably didn't appreciate your asking her to accommodate your needs.  Private pissing means no one else knows about it.

 

[Robert]

LOL

I cant believe you would even tell her, Lawyers!  

Now that is pretty funny.

Dont you remember when you were a kid and the excitement of possibly getting caught?

[Jess from VA]

...
What a thoroughly unpleasant person 

LOL!  I'm sure she thought much the same.  She doesn't have an easy option to piss outdoors and probably didn't appreciate your asking her to accommodate your needs.  Private pissing means no one else knows about it.

 

Carl, I was perfectly polite with her in our brief conversation.  She was entirely disagreeable and mean spirited anyway.  The big tree I pointed to would have blocked her view entirely of my person.  And despite being female, the overgrown wooded spot is private enough she could easily urinate in there without notice. 

[Robert]

The big tree I pointed to would have blocked her view entirely of my person. 

An honest lawyer     

[cookiedough]

If in the woods where NO ONE is walking by and seeing me, I see no issues doing the duty in public areas.  I sometimes if have to, go in my backyard but I also have NO neighbors behind me just side neighbors and I could care less what they think going near the field behind my house.

[GiG]

Uh oh, Jess is in a pissing match with a bag lady!