Military Cemetery

[Oldfishguy]

I had an extended family member pass away recently (96 year old WWII vet), and I didn’t make the interment.  So I took a little road trip for a visit an hour away today.  This is at Camp Ripley Military Cemetery near Little Falls Minnesota; it is just a beautiful place.  It has me rethinking my own thoughts on where to be buried, hopefully a few decades from now.  Morbid I know.  A local volunteer Honor Guard member gave me a quick tour and discussed the options (casket, cremation, spouse, etc).  A few things to think about.

What are the other veterans thinking?

David
Army 1980-83 Sgt

[carolinarider09]

My wife and I decided on pre-planned and pre-paid cremation.

Our choice was based on cost and minimizing the burden on our children

Cremation allows for several options which also includes traditional burial.  But burial is not required and there remain other options. 

While I am proud of my military service, I don't believe I deserve any special burial.  I will leave that as option for those who risked their lives in actual combat. 

Jim
U.S. Navy Petty Officer Second Class

I served in the United States Navy as an Electronics Technician (and Reactor Operator) and served for six years being honarlby discharged in December of 1973. 


There is somewhat of an "aside" to my choosing the pre-paid cremation.  As I said above, it limits the load that will be placed on my children and my children's children.  It also minimizes (if certain choices are made) requirements to travel to a place to visit my "remains".  I know where my parents are buried.  it is fairly close to my current home and I have visited them a couple of times but not as often as I probably should.  My wife's father and mother are buried in Minnesota.  She and I have not visited her mother's grave but have visited her father's grave site once.  We had to search for it. 

As for the selection of a military burial site, as I said above, I did serve and it was truly an educational and rewarding experience.  I did things I always dreamed of doing and some I never ever considered. 

My thought

[Jess from VA]

Both my parents did prepaid cremation, and so did I.  

This can be a touchy subject and a religious one too.  And I intend no offense.

Ease on survivors is best.  One phone call for cremation, how many for a funeral?

Price a funeral with all the fixings and think what that pile of money could be used for by those who inherit.  Funerals are a big cash business, why give them your money??  Of course it varies, but the computer tells me it's around $2500 for cremation, and $8000 for a funeral.

The guy asked me what I wanted in an urn, and I told him to flush me down the toilet (and I was serious).  We cannot do that sir!!!  So I have this big heavy urn stuffed behind the furnace duct work.

All those who've gone before have ashes spread out on my brother's property, so I guess that's where I'll end up.  Knowing my brother, I may go down the toilet anyway.  

Honor and cherish the living, you can do nothing for the dead (but remember).

[Jess from VA]

In my rides through the VA countryside and back roads, I occasionally pass private property that has small (likely family) cemeteries with headstones.  They are all old, and I've just assumed that is a practice that is no longer allowed.  This thread made me think to look it up, and I was wrong.

https://www.romemonuments.com/home-burials?srsltid=AfmBOoqFRLSdP1t5gw3hDmORueGhl5NXHDtsDXWbM8_xHMJeLwG0xn9u

In most states, the only restrictions to home burial are found in local zoning laws that tell you how and where you can bury the body.  For instance, they may outline how far from your neighbor’s property you can place a gravesite, how deep the grave must be, how close to a water source such as a stream or a lake you can bury the body, and various other restrictions.  A handful of states do require that you hire a funeral director to handle portions of the post-death process.  Only Indiana, California and Washington State outlaw the practice totally.



I always side with personal freedom, but I'm happy this practice hasn't caught on in my suburban neighborhood. 

[Jersey mike]

My father-in-law (Army ‘60-‘63) was cremated when he passed back in ‘21 and sits in our house with his photo. My Mother-in-law passed a couple years before him and my sister-in-law has her ashes.

We’ve been slow on having them interred at a military cemetery because before my father-in-law passed my wife’s sister moved out of state (but has since returned a year ago to NJ) with her mom’s ashes and then COVID hitThere’s a nice military cemetery about 45 minutes from our home, this is where we will most likely have them interred together. We were told interment are a one time thing, the vault would only be opened and closed one time.

My dad (Army ‘52-‘54) has preplanned cremation and will be buried with my mother who passed in ‘67.

My wife and I haven’t made decisions yet, although I’ve mentioned a few times I’d like my ashes scattered to the wind in Monument Valley or buried at this under water cemetery in Florida called Neptune’s Reef, but in reality we have no idea just what to do.

That cemetery you show looks well kept and if it’s a place you felt comfortable visiting, then maybe it’s a place you’d consider for your eternal rest.

I’ve been visiting cemeteries (family members) since I was a kid and as we get older the memories are still there but the visits do tend to get further in between. My mom and many other family members are in the same cemetery, same location but 90 minutes away and traffic makes it a difficult day to spend. Often times it has to ne an early morning departure, even on the weekends.

My grandparents (passed in late 1970’s) are about 30 minutes away and even then just stopping by for a visit have become seldom after years of routine visits.

Cemeteries are a place of rest for the dead and reflection for the living and as time passes life does get in the way so thoughts and prayers for loved one who’ve left us are still here but just not in their presence at their burial place.

Choose what’s best for you, your mind and something that will make you feel comfortable, not the ease of who can visit.

[Oldfishguy]

I'll make one more comment on this then stop, because it is a morbid topic.

Every state military cemetery rules and such will be different, that I'm sure of.  There are Federal cemeteries (think Arlington), and state cemeteries.  Some states will have both options, each with their own acceptance criteria.

The one I visited was a state military cemetery.  One of three currently scattered in the state with apparently two more under construction covering all the corners.  Burial of the veteran is free along with the headstone and perpetual care of the grounds.  The spouse has a one time fee of $983 (subject to change over time).  Minor children of the veteran can be buried with them along with disabled adults that were under the veterans care.  The veterans name is on the front of the headstone and the spouse on the backside of the stone.  If the spouse (non veteran) passes first, their name is on the front with the veterans name.  Once the veteran passes a new headstone is carved with the veteran on the front and the spouse on the rear of the stone.  Odd I know.  One can not prepay and reserve a particular spot.  There are spots for cremation erns in ground and mausoleums above ground as well.  There is no cremation, casket, or preparation of the body services with this.  Only burial services. 

A volunteer honor guard receives the veteran in a short ceremony, a gun salute and taps is played (typically a recording as that skill is in short supply).  Sometimes there is one a day, and sometimes ten a day.  I happened upon an interment.

With everything government related, there is paperwork.  It can take some time to be approved for burial so that should be done in advance.  Looks to be an online procedure.  

Admittedly, I have never have put much thought in to this.  But I will figure it out and write it down for my kids to know . . . and then put it away and live.  

[f6john]

We just had a 72 year old Patriot Rider returning from a funeral service at Camp Nelson, who was stopping for fuel, involved in a collision and killed. I did not know him but all comments I have read were all positive. News says they are still investigating. That troubles me a little bit. I always feel I can learn from these situations it I get the facts of what happened. That will make 4 local motorcycle deaths in August in my general vicinity. It could have been rider error in any of those situations but I don’t know the facts of any of them. I do know how cage drivers are when I’m in my own cage and many times they have little to no respect for other full size vehicles on the road and will take chances deliberately or mindlessly that put others (sometimes me) in jeopardy. Sometimes I think a really skilled rider can avoid the danger presented and then there are riders like myself in that same situation it might 50-50 on avoiding a crash.

But, on this glorious day I was able to run errands with the wind in my face and make it back home without any close calls.

[McJeep]

No grave in my future - never believed in taking up a chunk of land in perpetuity to mark my existence/passing when that land could be used to feed/house people - I do understand celebrating the lives of vets (I am one), just not for me

Immediate cremation and advised the fam to spread me wherever they see fit - I'ma be dead after all and their decision will not affect me in the least -

[Rams]

No grave in my future - never believed in taking up a chunk of land in perpetuity to mark my existence/passing when that land could be used to feed/house people - I do understand celebrating the lives of vets (I am one), just not for me

Immediate cremation and advised the fam to spread me wherever they see fit - I'ma be dead after all and their decision will not affect me in the least -

Whole Heartedly agree with the above posting.   Every time I ride of drive by a cemetary, the thought crosses my mind that there's a lot of grass some livestock could be eating.   Have advised my family and friends and now you of this wonderful organization.   Disposal of my body should be the least expensive way possible.   Personally, I like the idea of the "Body Farm" but, whatever.  I don't care what that process is.   While I'll have no decision in this (I'll be dead), I do not want a funeral and a waste of time and money for a celebration of life.   But all I can do is let folks know.

If cremation is chosen, I have told my family to put my ashes in an open urn, strap it to the back of one of my motorcycles and have my son ride that bike with me and let the wind blow my ashes wherever.

Everything I have has a designated recipient if they want it.   After that, I'm sure my wife will be giving away Valkyries to someone.

Rams

[Jess from VA]

Ron, the sooner you arrange cremation the cheaper it will be.

My folks got it done for considerably cheaper than I did (from the same company), and I did it 3-4 years ago, and it's more now. 

There are not all that many choices to make for cremation, but if you arrange it, you can make those decisions (and keep it as cheap as possible) (and keep the trouble of doing it off your survivors).

(I'm just sayin') 

[Rams]

Ron, the sooner you arrange cremation the cheaper it will be.

My folks got it done for considerably cheaper than I did (from the same company), and I did it 3-4 years ago, and it's more now. 

There are not all that many choices to make for cremation, but if you arrange it, you can make those decisions (and keep it as cheap as possible) (and keep the trouble of doing it off your survivors).

(I'm just sayin') 

Understood, have contacted the "Body Farm" about future reservations (my first choice).   The way I see it, at least that way something can be learned from my demise. 

Rams

[crow]

I made a cannon many years ago.  1 3/4 " ID. X 4" OD.   Uses 1/5 pound blk pwdr per shot.  Gona get cremated,  hava party and be shot out of it.  I heard yeas ago there was a company that would put ashes in a professional, like Disney grade,  firework and you may go out that way.

[McJeep]

I made a cannon many years ago.  1 3/4 " ID. X 4" OD.   Uses 1/5 pound blk pwdr per shot.  Gona get cremated,  hava party and be shot out of it.  I heard yeas ago there was a company that would put ashes in a professional, like Disney grade,  firework and you may go out that way.

good friend of mine had some of his ashes treated similarly - loaded 'im up in shotgun shells and went to the range