Last week I bent my left thumb nail back.

[..]

bout 10 minutes ago I hit the same thumb nail with a rubber mallet trying to straighten out a trailer hitch split pin.  

Dumb ass.

[Michvalk]

Is it back flat yet?

[..]

I had to cut away the nail at the tip last week so this time the pointed sharp ends of the remaining nail dug straight into the flesh normally covered by the nail.

Made me go Oooh Ahh and other words.

[R J]

I was wondering how much abuse it will take before it says that enough and falls off like mine did.

Mine went on the 1st whack...     

Can we say "O U C H,  m***er F***er, that smarted."

[solo1]

I can relate to that. I dropped a 50 pound fixture on my foot, broke and smashed the big toe.  On the job, so it was covered.  However, it kept hurting so the doc ended up pulling the toenail out with , for want of a fancy word, a pair of pliers.  Seems the new toenail was growing under the old broken one.

My eyes still water when i think of that!

[FLAVALK]

Go ahead and slam the car door on it. You'll forget about those first two boo-boos  

[czuch]

Well, theres two of the top ten things ya dont wanna do.

[Robert]

Done to many things like that when I read what you did I cringed. I have a blister growing out from under the nail now.

[junior]

you bunch of girls..............it doesnt really hurt till you loose it at the first joint

[Jess Tolbirt]

one day me and the misses was moving the couch.. i was barefooted and i told her to push while i pulled..we were on each end of it...it came easier than i thought and it caught both big toe nails and turned then straight up with my toes still under the couch... i told her to leave the room before the shock wears off... i sat down and reached down to push them back to their proper perspective and they both fell off,,,didn't bleed as much as i thought it was going to but it hurt like he77!!!!!

[..]

From these responses I know I AM a wimp.  

[Valkahuna]

Go ahead and slam the car door on it. You'll forget about those first two boo-boos  

I thought that was a form of birth control. 

[NCGhostrider]

OUCH!  Nothing like peeling a nail off or just bashing the hell out of it with a hammer.  I get the big boy words out then... like gosh, darn and oh my...and don't forget about the sunny beaches!!   

[junior]

Britman, i can feel your pain. i lost 5 nails and 2 joints all at once. the first feelings as it happened,(how to discribe the feeling) here try this firmly bite down on your pinky nailsat the cuticles count to 30 then hook them together (like a pinky promious)and pull.

the referance to you as a girl, i was just poking fun at you it wasnt ment to be insultive

[..]

the referance to you as a girl, i was just poking fun at you it wasnt ment to be insultive

Compared to some of the posted related injuries I am a big girls blouse. 

[alph]

I’ll tell you something that hurts worse then that! 

Last year we had some bees build a house in our house!!  They got in by the hot water vent, seems there was an unsealed hole next to the power vent.  Well, one night I went to get a glass of water, and didn’t turn on the light.  Walked into the kitchen barefoot and stepped on a bee!!  Stung me in the middle of my foot!!  Now, that’s the worse pain I had ever encountered in my life!!!  It took four hours before the pain subsided, four hours of feeling that damn stinger pulsating in my foot!!  Makes my foot hurt just typing about it!!!

[Jabba]

Now, that’s the worse pain I had ever encountered in my life!!! 

Seriously?  Wow...

Nail thru my shoe, thru my foot, and out the top of my shoe.  I drove to the ER with my shoe NAILED to my foot.  They pulled it out with a pair of pliers, before they could numb it up.

My worst pains... I think migraines, and kidney stones.  All the WHACK-Crash-smash pains are short lived.  The other two, you don't know if they will EVER go away.  I had a woman doctor tell me that she thinks kidney stones are worse than child birth.  ANd I would not wish a REAL migraine on anyone.  I am glad I only ever had a FEW.  If I was a chronic migraine sufferer... I'd chew on a shotgun barrel.

Now... in an effort to lighten the mood a little... I have on 2 different occasions, zipped my dood up in my zipper, to the point that I had to reverse the zipper to get it out, and drew blood in the process.
 

Jabba

[Black Dog]

zipped my dood up in my zipper, to the point that I had to reverse the zipper to get it out

DAYYYYMN....  You just puckered me up from head to toe...  You win  

In my younger days, a bunch of my buddy's and I took a MC trip to northern WI where a friend had a log cabin.  He had a 'Tarzan' rope that swung out over the river, and we were drinking (bad combination)  

My turn to run with the rope, swing way out and fly...  At full speed (as much speed as this fat boy could muster) I stubbed my left big toe, on an exposed tree root...  Face plant in the sand, and tumbled down the river bank...  Minus my big toe nail (found it still stuck in the tree root)...  Still ugly as hell to this day (they never grow back lookin' like new).

Sometimes I look back and wonder how I made it to this age...  

Black Dog

[Jabba]

zipped my dood up in my zipper, to the point that I had to reverse the zipper to get it out


Sometimes I look back and wonder how I made it to this age...  

Black Dog

That ain't no crap right there.

Me too.

Jabba

[Oss]

all kinda pain of great magnitude

there is the kidney stone kind... but could be even worse if they stick that grabber thingy up you know where to get it out  

there is the punctured or collapsed lung kind with the broken rib but I think worse is when they put in the tube with no anesthetic or maybe when they pull it out the same way

there is the pain of watching your valkyrie slide down the highway at 5omph with you bouncin behind it and then you see the highway peg sorta just fly off and the bike flips over and you know this aint gonna be pretty

there is the pain of squinting into the laser as the doc does eye star wars stuff on you and hearing him say oops.  have a permanent blind spot in the right eye but it dont hurt none as it was the result of retinpoathies and detached retina.  ever try to drive at night in the rain on a divided highway with all the oncoming headlites and with only one eye and that one is filled with blood so you cant see hardly at all

Aint gonna rank em they all suck

[czuch]

HOKAY, heres my big toe horror story.
Had a baaaad ingrown toenail. Bacardi 151 and real good smoke.
I grew the nail out so I could grab it, about 2 months. I scored the nail with a razor blade and drank and smoked. Then I clamped a vise-grip on the little piece and put the vise-grip in the door jamb with the door closed on it. YANK,,,, crap that hurt. I stumble backwards and as I'm falling I grab out and my hand wraps around the lip of my friend's 55 gallon fish tank. Did I mention i wasnt at my house and my friend wasnt home from work yet? The neighbor came up to see what the crash was. The bleeding had just started and the only sympathy I got was laughter. We were putting the fish into the kitchen sink and I was holding my toe in a bunch of paper towels. The offending piece of nail was firmly still in the vise-grip with a big steak hangin off.  Fixed the ingrown nail though.

[FLAVALK]

HOKAY, heres my big toe horror story.
Had a baaaad ingrown toenail. Bacardi 151 and real good smoke.
I grew the nail out so I could grab it, about 2 months. I scored the nail with a razor blade and drank and smoked. Then I clamped a vise-grip on the little piece and put the vise-grip in the door jamb with the door closed on it. YANK,,,, crap that hurt. I stumble backwards and as I'm falling I grab out and my hand wraps around the lip of my friend's 55 gallon fish tank. Did I mention i wasnt at my house and my friend wasnt home from work yet? The neighbor came up to see what the crash was. The bleeding had just started and the only sympathy I got was laughter. We were putting the fish into the kitchen sink and I was holding my toe in a bunch of paper towels. The offending piece of nail was firmly still in the vise-grip with a big steak hangin off.  Fixed the ingrown nail though.

Smoke and B-151 have been known to result in outcomes such as yours. Had you been a man, you would have doused the toe with B-151 and set a match to it. Cauterization stops the bleeding fast  


Is this a tough bunch or what?  

[Valkahuna]

zipped my dood up in my zipper, to the point that I had to reverse the zipper to get it out


Sometimes I look back and wonder how I made it to this age...  

Black Dog

That ain't no crap right there.

Me too.

Jabba

Hey Jabba, I've had 62 years to do the dumb stuff I seem to keep pulling. Yea, I've survived, but I've beat my body to a pulp in the process. You sure you're not my younger brother?