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Author Topic: I Just Got Notified Of An Exciting Cruise!  (Read 725 times)
X Ring
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*****
Posts: 3626


VRCC #27389, VRCCDS #204

The Landmass Between Mobile And New Orleans


« on: June 19, 2012, 11:02:39 AM »



The only cruise line that gives you guns and lets you shoot the pirates!

        THE ULTIMATE ADVENTURE CRUISE

        The Point News
        To The Point is excited to offer the ultimate adventure cruise along the pirate-infested coast of Somalia !

        We board our luxury cruise ship in Djibouti on the Gulf of Aden near the entrance to the Red Sea, and disembark in Mombassa , Kenya seven adrenaline-charged days later.

       

       

        Starting at $5,200 per-person (double occupancy, inside room) and $6,900 (veranda complete with bench rest), you'll relax like never before.

       

        That's because you are welcome to bring your own arsenal with you. If you don't have your own weapons, you can rent them from our onboard Master Gunsmith. Enjoy reloading parties every afternoon with skeet and marksmanship competitions every night!
        But the best fun of all, of course, is Pirate Target Practice.
        For the object of the cruise is to sail up and down the Somali Coast waiting to get hijacked by pirates. The weapons rental costs are as follows.

        Rent a full auto M-16 for only $25/day with ammo attractively priced at $16 per 100 rounds of 5.56 armor-piercing:

       

        On a budget? Rent a full-auto scope-mounted AK-47 for only $9/day with 7.62 ball ammo at $12 per 100 rounds:

       

        Hello! Nothing gets a pirate's attention like a Barrett M-107 .50-cal sniper rifle; only $59/day with 25 rounds of armor-piercing ammo affordably priced at only $29.95.

       

        Need a spotter? Our professional crew members can double as spotters for only $30/hour (spotting scope included, but gratuities are not.)

       

        Want to make a real impact? Rent an RPG for only $175/day with three fragmentation rounds included!

       

        Also included: Free complimentary night vision equipment - and throughout the night, coffee, pastries and snacks are always available on the main deck from 7pm until 6am.
        Deluxe package comes complete w/gourmet meals & all rooms offer a minibar.

        But that's not all! Twin mounted miniguns are available for rental at only $450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained fire!

       

        We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or you'll receive an instant $1,000 refund upon arrival in Mombassa.

        How can we make that guarantee? We operate at 5 knots just beyond 12 nautical miles off the coast of Somalia , thus in international waters where pirates have no rights whatever. In fact, we make three passes through the area's most treacherous waters to ensure maximum visibility by Somali "mother ships".

        We repeat this for five days, making three complete passes past the entire Somali Coast . At night, the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot every five minutes with loud disco music directionally beamed shoreside to attract maximum attention.

       

        Testimonials from previous participants in the Somali Cruise:
        "Six attacks in 4 days were more than I expected. I bagged three pirates, my wife nailed two, and my 12-year old son sank two boats with the mini-gun. This wonderful cruise was fun for the whole family" -- Fred D., Cincinnati , OH

        "Pirates 0, Passengers 32! Well worth the trip! Can't recommend it highly enough!" -- Ben L., Bethesda , MD

        "I haven't had this much fun since flying choppers in ' Nam . Don't worry about getting shot by pirates... they never even got close to the ship with the crap they shoot and their lousy aim... reminds me of a drunken juicer door-gunner we picked up from the motor pool in Phu Bai!" -- Dan J. - Denver , CO

       

        Come on board and bag your own clutch of genuine Somali pirates! But cabin space is limited so you need to respond quickly. Reserve your package before May 31st and get a great bonus - 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice. So sign up for the Ultimate Somali Coast Adventure Cruise now!


I'm booking mine now!   Cheesy

Marty
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People are more passionately opposed to wearing fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than bikers.           
musclehead
Member
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Posts: 7245


inverness fl


« Reply #1 on: June 19, 2012, 12:11:25 PM »

if only  Roll Eyes sounds like a NRA sponsored cruise  2funny
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'in the tunnels uptown, the Rats own dream guns him down. the shots echo down them hallways in the night' - the Boss
X Ring
Member
*****
Posts: 3626


VRCC #27389, VRCCDS #204

The Landmass Between Mobile And New Orleans


« Reply #2 on: June 19, 2012, 12:37:42 PM »

Matter of fact that was at the bottom of the email!

Marty
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People are more passionately opposed to wearing fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than bikers.           
czuch
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Posts: 4140


vail az


« Reply #3 on: June 19, 2012, 02:07:40 PM »

I've been on two.
 Didnt have that kind of accomodations, and the food probably wasnt as good.
Come to think about it, the activity director was kinda barky.  I'd go again.
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Aot of guys with burn marks,gnarly scars and funny twitches ask why I spend so much on safety gear
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