My luck has changed.....I think!

[John Schmidt]

I won a Nigerian lottery according to an email from a Nigerian prince. He holds the sum of ONE MILLION  DOLLARS in my name and he wants to send it to me  FREE!
 
All I have to do is give him my bank account numbers and send him $500.00 US dollars cash, to show my good faith so he can transfer the money!

And then I got ANOTHER email. It's from a KENYAN "prince" who wants to give me FREE healthcare for life!
 
All I have to do is give  him:
* my BANK ACCOUNT  NUMBERS,
* MY SOCIAL SECURITY  NUMBER
* MY CONFIDENTIAL HEALTH  INFORMATION
* and pay $700 per month for a policy with only a $10,000 deductible

Then he can make it happen!

Am I lucky or  what?  

[Raverez]

Yeah, lucky you didn't respond to those offers!

[wiggydotcom]

I'm sorry, John....I think you've been had.....Because all of the Nigerian Lotteries and inheritances I get contacted about are for at least FORTY million.
I'd hold out for the better ones if I were you-before giving out you acct numbers.

I used to be mildly interested in screwing with those people...but I get so many, I just delete em.

[old2soon]

For John ONLY-Beach front property in Arizona And 2 or 3 bridges in California!  And I MIGHT have a line on one or two of the Great Lakes!  RIDE SAFE.

[art]

How come I never get them? I can sure use the money . I guess I don't rate.

[Strider]

HEY, WE ARE RELATED!!!!!  After much research, they had found that I was closest living relative of the same Nigerian prince!  HELLO BROTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[jimmytee]

  Love the Obamacare joke   

[Patrick]

Boy, some guys have all the luck.  I'm so happy for you.   

[cookiedough]

depending on my mood,  If I get a call from someone I do not know,  I usually do not answer it (have caller id), but once lately I was in a bad mood and answered the phone.  It was a security company asking me if I felt safe in my home.  I said yes, I have Mr. Smith and Mr. Wesson along with Mr. Ruger and Mr. Mossberg with Mr. Remington as well in my home.  She didn't get it at first, but kept going on an on about how I needed their security system.  I told her not interested, if someone breaks in,  they won't live to tell about it and hung up on her.   

Now that I cancelled my home phone and only have a cell phone line,  no more pleasure in making sales people's day.    I like the peace and quiet of not having a home phone. 

If I see an email like that I do not know,  do NOT open it up, could be a virus, delete immediately.

[John Schmidt]

I used to mess with sales calls also. Following my divorce in '88 I thought it would be fun to record my greeting on the answering machine, then record that, and record that, etc., etc. The end result was something like: You've reached John Schmidt's phone, You've reached John Schmidt's phone.....and on and on the same thing. Think I recorded it about 8 times and usually got hung up on after about the 3rd repeat. Didn't get many calls after the first couple months.

One thing I found both amusing and irritating was when my present wife and I were dating and I had a message on my answering machine. It would be flashing when we returned from an evening out and it bugged her no end when I didn't check it, she felt I was cheating behind her back. I recognized the number most of the time and finally one afternoon she really told me how she felt when I tried to cover up my straying. So I told her to go ahead and turn it on and listen to it herself. She did, and was embarassed beyond measure.....it was my mother!  The subject never came up again. We've been married nearly 21 years and she still giggles about that episode. 

[Hooter]

they must have a lot of money cause I won that same thing...Is this a split?   

[bigguy]

I won a Nigerian lottery according to an email from a Nigerian prince. He holds the sum of ONE MILLION  DOLLARS in my name and he wants to send it to me  FREE!
 
All I have to do is give him my bank account numbers and send him $500.00 US dollars cash, to show my good faith so he can transfer the money!

And then I got ANOTHER email. It's from a KENYAN "prince" who wants to give me FREE healthcare for life!
 
All I have to do is give  him:
* my BANK ACCOUNT  NUMBERS,
* MY SOCIAL SECURITY  NUMBER
* MY CONFIDENTIAL HEALTH  INFORMATION
* and pay $700 per month for a policy with only a $10,000 deductible

Then he can make it happen!

Am I lucky or  what?  

Go with the first deal. Sounds more legit.