thinkin' 'bout cha all!Winter Diary
August 12
Moved to our new home in Michigan. It is so wonderful here; Lake
Michigan is magnificent. Can hardly wait to see snow on the trees.
October 14
Michigan is the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves are turning
shades of red and orange. Went for a drive through the forest near
Lake Michigan and saw some deer. They are so graceful. Certainly,
they are the most wonderful animals on earth. Saw the sunset over the
lake. This must be paradise. I love it here.
November 11
Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill
such a gorgeous creature. Hope it will snow soon. I love it here more
each day!
December 1
5:00 PM. It's starting to snow. The first of the season and the first
one we've seen in years. The wife and I took our hot buttered rums
and sat by the picture window, watching the snow flakes drift down,
clinging to the trees and covering the ground. It was soooo
beautiful!
December 2
Woke up to find everything blanketed with white. It looked like a
perfect picture postcard. We went outside and had a snowball fight (I
won). Later, I shoveled snow for the first time in years and loved it.
I did both our driveway and our sidewalk. Later, a city snowplow
came along and accidentally covered up our driveway with compacted
snow from the street. The driver smiled and waved. I waved back and
shoveled it again. What a beautiful place; I love Michigan.
December 8
It snowed an additional 5 inches last night and the temperature has
dropped to around 11 degrees. Several limbs on the trees and shrubs
snapped due to the weight of the snow. I shoveled our driveway again.
Shortly afterwards the snowplow came by and did his trick again. Much
of the snow is now brownish-gray.
December 12
Warmed up enough during the day to create some slush which soon became
ice when the temperature dropped again. Bought studded snow tires for
the car. Fell on my ass in the driveway, shoveling after the snowplow
came through (for the third time that day). $145.00 to the
chiropractor, but nothing was broken. More snow and ice expected.
December 13
More of that white sh*t fell last night. I've got blisters on my hands
from shoveling. I think the snow-plow hides around the curve and
waits until I'm done shoveling the driveway. A**hole!
December 25
Merry Christmas. More frigging snow. If I ever get my hands on
that son-of-a-bitch who drives the snow-plow, I swear I'll kill the
bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt
the damn ice.
December 27
More white sh*t last night. Been inside for three days except for
shoveling out the driveway after that snow-plow goes through every
time. Can't go anywhere, car's stuck in a mountain of white sh*t. The
weatherman says to expect another 10" of the sh*t again tonight. Do
you know how many shovels full of snow 10" is?
December 28
The f***ing weatherman had his head up his ass - we got 24" of that
white sh*t this time. At this rate, it won't melt before the summer.
The snow-plow got stuck in the road and that bastard came to the
door and asked to borrow my shovel. After I told him I had broken
six shovels already, shoveling all the sh*t he pushed into the
driveway, I broke my last one over his f***ing head. I couldn't find
my ice ax to finish him off - it was buried under a f***ing snowdrift!
December 29
2 degrees outside. More f***ing snow. Not a tree or shrub on our
property that hasn't been damaged. Power was off most of the night.
Tried to keep from freezing to death with candles and a kerosene
heater, which tipped over and nearly burned the house down. I managed
to put the flames out, but suffered 2nd degree burns on my hands and
lost all my eyelashes and eyebrows. On the way home from the emergency
room, I slid on the ice trying to miss a deer and almost put the car
in Lake Michigan. Totaled the car anyway against an iceberg - yes, a
f***ing iceberg on the f***ing Lake Michigan shoreline! I should have
hit the cursed deer and taken my chances. Those f***ing beasts
should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed them ALL last November.
January 4
cursed m*****-f***ing white sh*t keeps coming down. Have to put on
all the clothes we own just to get to the f***ing mailbox. Power
still off. Toilet froze and part of the roof has started to cave in.
Tried to take a piss outside and ended up with a d***sicle.
January 7
Sixteen more f***ing inches of f***ing snow and f***ing sleet and
f***ing ice and god knows what other f***ing white sh*t fell last
night. I wounded the f***ing snowplow a**hole with the ice ax, but
he got away. Wife left me. Car won't start. I think I'm going
snowblind. I can't move my toes. Haven't seen the sun in weeks. More
f***ing snow predicted. Wind chill MINUS 22 degrees.
January 8
Moved back to........ I can't imagine why anyone in their right mind
would ever live in that God-forsaken state of Michigan!
Hope y'all up North are stayin' warm!
Love Whiskey & Sugar.
