Great quotes on sex

[Patrick]

 
Great Quotes on
Sex
 
"There are a number of mechanical
devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among
these is the Mercedes-Benz SL500."

Lynn Lavner


"Sex at age 90 is like trying to
shoot pool with a rope."

Camille
Paglia


"Women might
be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole
relationship."

Sharon Stone


"Hockey is a
sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport
for white men dressed like black
pimps."

Tiger
Woods



"My
mother never saw the irony in calling me a
son-of-a-bitch."

Jack
Nicholson


" Clinton lied. A man might forget
where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter
how bad it is."

Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)
   
 


"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin
word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his
wallet."

Robin
Williams

"According to a new survey, women
say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do
undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too
judgmental, where, of course, men are just
grateful."

Robert De Niro


"There's a new medical crisis.
Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex
condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the
problem?"

Dustin
Hoffman

"There's very little advice in
men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me
somebody naked !"

Jerry
Seinfeld

"See, the problem is that God
gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a
time."

Robin
Williams


"It's been so long since I've had
sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom..."

Joan Rivers


Sex is one
of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences money can buy.


Steve
Martin


You don't appreciate a lot of stuff
in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day
by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for later in
life.

Elmo
Phillips


"Bigamy is having one wife too
many. Monogamy is the same."

Oscar
Wilde


"It isn't premarital sex if you
have no intention of getting married."

George Burns
 
 

[Tx Bohemian]

Those are good!!

One I heard a long time ago, I think by an up and coming comedian:


Sex is like pizza;

When it's good, it's real good!

When it's bad,
it's still pretty good!!


(I've used this and changed "pizza" to bike riding, works that way too)