Oil change... or Exxon Valdez II

[RNFWP]

It's funny now, so here it goes, I'll embarrass myself for your amusement.

How many times have I changed the Valkyrie's oil? Could look in my records and find out, but without doing that I'll just say more than a few times. Like most of you, that's not to mention the countless times I've successfully accomplished this routine maintenance task on various makes and models of cars, trucks, tractors, mowers and other small engines over the years going back to when I was a teenager. I've had used oil run down my arm and even more get on the driveway or ground while trying to maneuver containers or transferring from pans to jugs etc.

This one caught me by surprise.
I've changed oil while the bike was on the lift, on previous occasions, while doing other work or cleaning. This time, like most, the bike was resting on it's tires and side stand on my concrete garage floor. Warmed up, wrench, catch pan, rags, funnel, new oil and filter gathered up and ready.  With drain plug and filter removed and the used oil slowing to a drip it's time to stand the bike upright for a few minutes to let gravity have it's effect on the oil in the left side of the engine.

Due to a lesson learned from another embarrassing moment in the garage. (used to stand next to the bike and move it around the garage with the handle bars. Until once, failing to realize the kickstand had gone up, I laid the bike down on the left engine guard)  So this time I'm sitting in the seat holding the bike upright with my legs. Less tiring too...

NOT being like a millennial addicted to social media... however, why waste those minutes picking my nose. The phone comes out to see who's posting about the upcoming rides or if DDT has a new chapter in the life and times of the great adventurer.

I'm sitting there looking down at my phone when something catches my eye... moving underneath the bike and between my feet. What the heck is that?? No way, It can't be!  Looking like hot fudge sundae sauce there's a puddle oozing out from under the pegs on both sides. Oh man, if that gets under my feet it's gonna get real slippery. A quick dismount...

Fortunately it came to mind almost immediately that I have what's left of a 20 some odd pound container of kitty litter close at hand in the garage. (from when one of my front forks dumped it's fluid years ago) Hey, I left one of those little gardening shovels in the container, that's handy. Down on my hands and knees rapidly building a levy around the perimeter to stop the spread. That's what they do with the big spills in the ocean right?

Obviously the pan wasn't in the right position. Still not sure where I screwed up.  Did the bike move while I was getting on it, did I bump the pan getting my stuff ready or just not account enough for the drain shifting slightly (it's not on the center line). Doesn't really matter... what's next? Well this is going to take longer than normal. I think I just lost my position on the pit crew. Demoted back down to taking out the garbage and sweeping. Hey, I wonder if I've got enough kitty litter to sweep up this whole mess? Only one way to find out.  I keep shoveling and buried the whole spill. With some left over for what I hope is never the next time.

While that soaked in I needed to put the new filter on and refill the engine because I didn't want to do the refill on the slope of the driveway. Plus, it will be easier to get a proper clean up with the bike out of the way.

Sidebar for some personal nostalgia...
I'm one of those that use a beer can as an oil filter cover (I know it doesn't offer any worthy protection) it's just for the fun of it. I've been using the same one for years. It's from a local brewery called Quest. It was like my Cheers (tv sitcom). All the bartenders and staff knew me. I became friends with one of the owners. I'm still friends with some of the other people that hung out there. Unfortunately it was one of the casualties of 2020.



Back at Valdez... Using the little shovel I stirred the mess until it seemed like something that could be scooped up. I found my nasty ol whisk broom. Now where is my nasty old cracked dustpan?  Oh well, Jill won't mind if use the brand new shiny one hanging in the house as long as I clean it up real good before I put it back, right?
That's some oily, sticky sh^t..uff. A second dose of litter. Rub that in real good. Now it's walkable without greasing up your soles. How am I gonna clean the wife's new dustpan. Don't want that in the sink or down the drain. Need something that'll cut through the oil. I know... brake cleaner.

It's not shiny anymore... more of flat black.
She hasn't noticed... so far 
Hey, wasn't it like that when you bought it? 
No birds, fish or seals were harmed during any of the events contained in this story. Any resemblance to any of your own maintenance mishaps is coincidental.

[Valker]

You should have run the dustpan through the dishwasher for extra points.

[..]

I've been close when sliding the oil pan but never an Exxon Valdez.

[msb]

Good story....and funny too I've also come close to doing that on a number of occasions ...nothing full meal deal like your experience here, but enough to leave permanent stains on my nice polished concrete  garage floor.

Sidebar...I'm also one who's used a beer can (Molson Canadian when they had the Red maple leaf, or anything else Red, Silver, & Black that matches my bike) as a filter cover for years. A great conversation starter at gas, etc. stops. I do leave enough room for a piece of Styrofoam at the front end of the can. With respect to the question about not providing any protection, I wonder about all those who run their bikes with no filter cover...you know, like from the factory 

[DDT (12)]

Ross,

Great story in its own rite, but especially so since it isn't my story! That's not to say I haven't had a boo-boo or two. I was changing the oil at a motel in NM once upon a time: I pulled the plug just as a gust of wind scooted the catch pan over (aluminum basting pan picked up at a local grocery store), and... I did manage to slide the pan back before a major spill occurred, but a rather large stain remained as we departed that motel the following morning. I've even learned the lesson the hard way of checking for the old oil filter gasket sticking to the engine opening... Yeah, that left a very nice stain in my old garage in Alabama.

Thanks for sharing the experience with all the rest of us... It's fun to read stuff like that and recall all of the similar incidents we've had ourselves. I doubt there is anyone on this board who hasn't pulled some bonehead stunt or other... We all enjoy being reminded we're not alone!!! BTW, not just a good story, but a story told well... I enjoy reading your stuff!!!

DDT

[Jess from VA]

I've never had that much of a spill, but no matter how careful I am, I still generally get some splatter, esp when standing the bike up to get the last of the oil out (and bumping the starter to get it ALL out). 

So I always lay a big lawn and leaf bag under the bike (and pan and filter) for all oil changes. 

Oil stains on the concrete is not a badge of honor.   

When draining the bike, you want the oil fill cap and the dipstick out (and filter off).  And hot, not warm oil.

[old2soon]

        Garage I used to work at part time as a young un had an outside 2 post lift. 30 gal catch tank with an adjustable metal funnel attached to a metal tube/pipe thingy. I've had hot oil a time or 3 in the armpit. And being as the lift was right in front of the shop overhead door you tried Hard to keep that area from gittin slippery. I wasn't Always succesful!  I've managed to contain Most of the oil when wurkin on Phatt Ghurl but Not All the oil All the time!  As a side note if you use Dawn dish soap that stuff works Well. I no longer bother with any type of mechanic soap. Dawn WILL git er done!  RIDE SAFE. 

[0leman]

Before we left out home in CA to move to OR some 12 years ago, I had two bikes.  My Valk and 1100 Shadow.   I was going to ride the Shadow up to OR first.   (Had just changed the oil on her the night before)  I got about two miles on the road when felt something wrong.  was getting wet.   Not water but oil.  I had forgotten to put the fill plug back in.  Kind of a mess to clean up with most of our stuff in storage.

Thankfully have not had problems draining oil from any of the various bikes I have had.  Just forgot to put the plug back in.

[RP#62]

To try and make you feel better about your incident, let me tell you about two of mine - a minor one and a major one.

First the minor one.  I was working at the Naval Air Station Boca Chica maintaining Navy flying club aircraft.  One day, I figured I'd change the oil on my truck before I went home.  I had brought the oil with me to work that day.  I was quick.  I pulled the truck up onto the ramp in front of the shop.  I quickly drained the oil and was in the process of adding the new oil in and noticed nice clean oil coming from under the truck and surrounding my feet.  I forgot to put the drain plug back in.  Now not only could I not finish, but I had to call my wife to get more oil and bring it out to me so I could get home.

Now the grand finale.  Me and another mechanic were working a problem on a Convair 440 aircraft.  It was having problems with one of the props going into reverse and not wanting to come out, but it was an intermittent problem.  The way this works is there's a pump that pulls oil from the oil tank and routes it to the prop dome.  There's a piston in the prop dome and if you route oil to one side of it, it turns the blades toward the feather position and it you route it to the other side it turns the blades to the reverse position.  The prop governor routes the oil to the proper side of the piston based on selections in the cockpit.  When oil goes to one side of the piston in the prop dome, the oil that was on the other side is dumped into the crankcase and when the engine is running its scavenged back to the tank.  This is key to the story.  This being an intermittent problem, caused us to continuously cycle the prop into and out of reverse most of the night.  We finally found that there was a wire in the connector to the prop governor that was shorting intermittently causing the problem, so we fixed it and went to take a break.  While we were on break, the line boy came around checking oils and noticed that the oil tank on the engine we had been working on was way low, so he topped off the tank. He didn't tell us.  So....I come out after break to taxi the airplane over to the parking area.  I start up both engines and slowly began moving out of maintenance and towards the taxiway.  The whole time the engine is running, its trying to scavenge oil out of the crankcase back to a full oil tank.  About the time I got up onto the taxiway, the oil tank ruptured and dumped 35 gallons of black yucky oil on the ramp.

I parked the airplane and we changed the tank the next day but spent the rest of the night cleaning up the mess (and plotting the demise of the line boy).  For years I could look at that airport on google earth and see the spot I made.

-RP

[Rams]

Never had a FUBAR with the bike or trike (yet) but, I am guilty of forgetting to re-install the drain plug on a Chevy pickup many moons ago (once).   Put five or six quarts through that engine and right onto the driveway before I saw the puddle.   Yeah, I've had my own FUBARs.

Edit:  My only excuse to the above is that I started the oil change just prior to mowing the lawn, I'm one of those folks that likes to completely empty the oil pan (as much as possible) so, I'll let it drip until it drips no more.   After mowing, I went back to the truck to finish and re-installing that oil plug was totally out of mind.   Didn't help that my girlfriend (at the time) was sunbathing on the patio. 

Rams  

[Cyclejohn]

NOT being like a millennial addicted to social media...

The phone comes out to see who's posting.

You had me at hello. Not being like or exactly like. You made me smile.

Thank you for that.

John