Busy week ahead

[f6john]

Always seem to be traveling around the holidays. This year my mother had sort of committed to come to our house for the Thanksgiving weekend but that changed last week when she decided it would be better for her to stay home. I’m good with that as she should be calling all her own shots at 97. My goal is for her to be comfortable and content and that seems to be her at home. I go see her now once a week and take her out for lunch if you she’s feeling like getting out. Winter has a very negative effect on her mood and her thoughts but that’s ok too. So it will still be a family Thanksgiving at my house and then we will load up and take as much Thanksgiving spirit as we can with us to her house.

Hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving with family and friends and a great time of fellowship and companionship for those who won’t be able to gather together with their close family.

[Jess from VA]

You're a good son John.

My 96yo mom is 9 hours (of combat freeway) away, so I'll call.

My next-door-to-her brother and wife will have her over for turkey dinner.  

Mom and I have both decided holidays are not much of a big deal to us anymore.  (They're sort of a reminder of all the people who used to be there, but have passed.)

I sent her a huge bouquet of flowers for her (96) birthday last week, and she told me they are wilting all over the place and making a big mess, and I should only send a card next year.  Will do.  

[old2soon]

You're a good son John.

My 96yo mom is 9 hours (of combat freeway) away, so I'll call.

My next-door-to-her brother and wife will have her over for turkey dinner.  

Mom and I have both decided holidays are not much of a big deal to us anymore.  (They're sort of a reminder of all the people who used to be there, but have passed.)

I sent her a huge bouquet of flowers for her (96) birthday last week, and she told me they are wilting all over the place and making a big mess, and I should only send a card next year.  Will do.  

     Jess next year go to florist shop take out yer phone and git pictures of many floral arrangements/boquets!  Send the pics with the card!  Yer welcome!  RIDE SAFE.

[Jess from VA]

Jess next year go to florist shop take out yer phone and git pictures of many floral arrangements/boquets!  cooldude Send the pics with the card!  coolsmiley Yer welcome!

Dennis, I'm pretty sure she knows what flowers look like.

She's still got all her marbles and good manners and diplomacy.  I should have added that she said they were beautiful and thanked me very much... except they were making a big mess as they wilted.  My goal is to never give her work to do or headache to deal with.  

I'll get her anything she wants, and my greatest hope is that she's still around for next year's birthday.    

Following my lead, she has been walking outdoors for 3/4 mile every single morning on the upright walker I got her.  I'm so proud of her.  

[Hook#3287]

Jess, that walker looks awesome

Are those brake lines hanging down?

[Jess from VA]

Jess, that walker looks awesome

Are those brake lines hanging down?

Yeah Bill.  Pistol grip hand brakes.  You rest or lean your forearms on the top and steer it around.  Front wheels are castors.  If you turn around, you can sit down on it and the loop halfway down is a backrest.  And a bag for stuff, water, or beer.  

Instead of moving around using only your hands and wrists to support your weight, you lean into this thing and are supported by your forearms (much less chance of falling).  And it's much better on your (old) back than being hunched over (and dragging the back legs).

It's really too big to navigate around indoors (at least in my mom's small, purpose-built for old people home).  She uses a conventional little one in the house, but the upright for outdoor walking.  And my brother poured a dead flat eighth mile driveway which is her walking surface (with no traffic, curbs, yada) (long before she needed a walker).  

[scooperhsd]

It has been a busy November for us.
1. The trip to Tampa / Key west FL (Key west Duval street reminded me of a smaller french Quarter)
2. MIL passed away Nov 10 after fighting Dementia for the last 10 years, the last 3.5 years in a Memory care unit
3. Funeral Nov 13 Afternoon
4. 10 days after death, get Death Certificates from Funeral Home
5. November 22 - family holiday dinner in Hutchinson KS (my hometown, where 1 brother and my sister live)
6 - since then - working on getting the utilities changed over to us, and activating the Deed on death. Also got Mom's suite cleared out. We still need to find a realestate attorney to add me to the deed in addition to wife now owning house. Also we want to get our passports, probably next month / early January.

And we want to continue clearing out the basement, attic, and garage so we can use the spaces more efficiently. Need to have someone who does basement waterproofing find and fix where water is coming into the basement.

[Hook#3287]

Did you see where three brothers cleaning out their Mothers house found an original Superman comic 1st edition and sold it for 9 MILLION DOLLARS!

Makes cleaning out the old homestead a little more interesting 

[cookiedough]

Did you see where three brothers cleaning out their Mothers house found an original Superman comic 1st edition and sold it for 9 MILLION DOLLARS!

Makes cleaning out the old homestead a little more interesting 

I wish was that lucky.  After cleaning out my mom/dad's house well sort of, we went I think almost thru it all at least and looked at most items hoarded upstairs and not find much of value.  We got lucky and found someone who wanted to buy whatever was left in the house to resell on ebay, etc. probably 5-6 grand total at most if sold it all.  We coulda had an auction sale, but that would also take well over 2 weekends to clear all the crap out of her upstairs, etc. and setup, etc. NOT worth it to us.  I think we took 5 to 6 items to keep out of 1,000's left for new homeowners.  One was my 1970's fonzie (happy days tv show) doll I had as a kid with his thumbs that went up/down in good shape.  Maybe worth 20 bucks now, LOL...  We spent few weekends over there mostly upstairs looking at all the crap piled up 6 ft tall by 25+ ft long just a skinny walking path amongst 10ft. wide upstairs, what a cluster F.!!   Mom liked to go to garage sales and shop for knick nacks with her younger sister who also passed away few years prior.

[f6john]

Nobody in our household was ever into baseball cards so I’m out of luck there. But dolls, I’ve got dolls!





My mother and my Aunt were heavily into to porcelain hand cast, fired, and painted of all sizes and descriptions. They went to doll shows and street fairs and just enjoyed their craft. My mother was the main seamstress and made the doll bodies and clothes. It was good for them and they seemed to thrive on it.




And this is not all of them that my sister and I will have to find a home for!

[HayHauler]

John, I am in the same, or worse boat.  We (my wife) have over 3,000 Barbie dolls.  Most of them are worth pennies on the dollar to what was paid for them.  We are in the process of reducing the size of the "collection", but it is a tough row to hoe for my wife.
She hasn't seen these for over 20 years, but all of the memories come flooding back to when she bought or traded for most of them.

Good luck.

Hay 
Jimmyt

[Jess from VA]

Nobody in our household was ever into baseball cards so I’m out of luck there. But dolls, I’ve got dolls!

Wow, that is quite the collection John.  And no doubt worth some money.

I would find a whole room of those dolls staring at me quite spooky and disconcerting. 

 

[f6john]

Jess, these dolls have been in that room in the basement of my mothers house for over 25 years. The door stays shut, so out of sight, out of mind I tried to encourage my mother to give some of them away to people she thinks would maybe like to have one, but that fell on deaf ears. She has done some clearing out of drawers where papers were stored then she decided when she was gone my sister and I could sort through the rest. Fortunately, neither of my parents were hoarders so there is minimal junk to dispose of. The house is a low pitch ranch style so the attic has never been a storage space, the basement is 90% finished living space so the dolls were the only collections that have been allowed to exist.

[Jess from VA]

John, if those dolls were in my house, they'd be in the attic.   

When I was a little boy, and the family would drive us down to visit her parents in WVa, they stuck me in the spare bedroom which had a wall full of grandad's giant deer head mounts, and those big glass eyes staring at me scared me so much mom would cover all of them with towels or I wouldn't sleep in there. (I haven't thought about this for decades).  Today, I'd love a couple of those deer mounts, but no dolls thank you. 

Speaking of attics, the people who sold me my house left like 50 bolts of cloth in the single story side of my split level, and when I finally discovered them, it took me hours of bumping my head under a 3 1/2 foot ceiling in 100 degrees to drag them all out of there.  And then the trash collectors wouldn't take them.  The wife was some kind of seamstress.  I had 30 inches of free blown fiberglass blown into both my attics (with good vents), and I haven't been in one for 20 years. 

I was just talking to my mom yesterday and she was telling me (and stressing) about getting her little house cleaned out before she passes so my brother won't have to.  Mom, I've been up there many times, and you have a very small place, all neat and tidy, and there can't be that much stuff to get rid of.  Stop worrying about it.    Even at 96 on a walker, mom remains a meticulous housekeeper.

[Serk]

I've been... gently.... encouraging my parents to downsize, sort things, label pictures, etc... Haven't had a lot of luck but they've made small progress.

[f6john]

I've been... gently.... encouraging my parents to downsize, sort things, label pictures, etc... Haven't had a lot of luck but they've made small progress.

Good luck with that Brian! I’ve been in my attic for a couple of hours pulling down Christmas stuff. I noticed a lot of my things that I hope I will never need but still keep them. Roof jacks, I have no intention of being on a 12/12 pitch roof ever again! I have not one but two roofing shovels, I can guarantee I will not be stripping shingles off any roof’s either! My flooring nailer has seen its last strip of 3/4” hardwood in my hands. And the he list goes on.

[Jess from VA]

I'm never downsizing tools and equipment.

I once had 5 motorcycles (one, the wife's), but that got to be a big problem with storage and expensive, so now I only have 2 (and one should go).

What I have is paperwork.  Being a shyster for 30 years, I keep stuff like all my report cards (grades), transcripts, 70 page thesis, every leave and earnings statement from the military and USDVA, medical records, shot records (if you lost that while on duty they insisted on giving you every immunization known to man, and maybe all at once), deeds, tax records, all my moving violations (from youth, excluding DUI and reckless, everything else), credit history, marriage and divorce records, resumes, writing samples, and more.

I needed this stuff once upon a time, but not now.  But I will not be going through all that crap, so someone else will.  It doesn't take up that much room; but the two filing cabinets are heavy.

I'm also a bit of a librarian and probably have a couple thousand books.  Law books, research materials, novels (everything of my favorite authors), whole collections on certain subjects like firearms, motorcycles, yada.  And big piles of magazines going back 40 years on subjects I'm interested in.

I've given away most of my good suits, shoes, shirts and ties, and a ton of other stuff (esp after losing 35lbs).  I throw out big stuff that takes up room.  But my two sheds (tools and bikes - lawn equipment/generator) are jammed full and I'm not getting rid of any of it.

My heirs get good stuff and money, and get to enjoy going through the rest of it.  

[HayHauler]

So Jess, my wife has our tax records from 1993 when we were married.  Do we REALLY need this stuff?  I don't think so, but others opinion differ.

Hay 
Jimmyt

[Hook#3287]

Yeah, I've got tax records going back close to 3 decades 

Really don't need any of it and have rarely looked at them except to get them out of the way.

Does Home Depot rent out commercial shredders?

I'm thinking burn pile might do it.

[Jess from VA]

So Jess, my wife has our tax records from 1993 when we were married.  Do we REALLY need this stuff?  I don't think so, but others opinion differ.

Hay  
Jimmyt

Some 15-20 years ago, I made a simple mistake in the math in a past federal tax return and the IRS took exception to it.  There may be a statute of limitations on how far back the IRS can go back and contest a tax return, I don't know (and I'm not looking it up).  But I was glad to have my file of old returns to look over (I usually keep worksheets with these saved returns too), find my mistake, and ante up the few hundred dollars I owed relying on my own records and not just their demand letter.

I've needed to go back and look at old military and USDVA pay statements too.

I keep this stuff in self defense and protection (like guns you hope you never need).  

And it's sure not worth my time and energy and hours/days of tedious study to go back through all this sh!t to weed out what to still save and discard the rest.  

I'm enough of a detail freak as it is.    

I'd much rather be outdoors doing simple work like raking leaves, mowing the lawn or washing my truck.  

[Hook#3287]

Once upon a time I heard the IRS is not interested in anything 7 years or older.

Seems it depends on what the individual situation is.


AI Overview:

The statement that the IRS is not interested in anything seven years or older is a simplification; the general rule is based on the statute of limitations, which is typically three years for most situations [1].
Key factors and exceptions to the rule include:

Typical Statute of Limitations:

The IRS generally has three years from the date you filed your original tax return to assess additional tax [1].

Significant Underreporting: The statute of limitations extends to six years if you substantially understate your gross income (usually by more than 25%) [1, 2].

Fraud: In cases of fraud or failure to file a return, there is no statute of limitations, meaning the IRS can audit or assess taxes at any time [1, 2, 3].

Record Keeping: The IRS recommends keeping records for at least three years, but for certain assets or situations, longer retention periods may be necessary [1].

Ultimately, the seven-year mark is often a common guideline for certain business records or specific circumstances, but it is not a universal legal cutoff for the IRS's interest in all tax matters [1, 2]. You can find detailed information on the IRS's official guidance page regarding recordkeeping duration and the statute of limitations."

[Rams]

I’ve been going through the down sizing thing since we moved to TN.   Have given a huge amount of stuff away, thrown away a bunch and offered almost all of it to family and friends prior to disposing of it.  The ironic thing is, almost everything I decided to sell is what those friends and family want for free…..
Funny how that works.   

Rams

[Jess from VA]

I had a great big pile of Costco 100% cotton boxer underbritches in Large that were like new but falling off me.

I first washed and dried them, then tried to give them to my neighbor/friend across the street who is a Large and he absolutely didn't want them or to even look at them.   

I decided a big bag of good cotton rags was probably a good idea. 

[Hook#3287]

Yeah Jess, I find my rag pile is growing more than my use is.

My newish rule on clothes purchases has been updated.

Because I still have clothes that may or may not still fit me, some of my closets have stuff going back 5 decades.  Hey, stuff comes back into fashion sometimes.

So the new rule is, whenever I buy a new piece of wardrobe, I have to get rid of something.

Seems to be working.

I still have way to much, but it's not growing.

[Jess from VA]

Yeah Jess, I find my rag pile is growing more than my use is.

One?  I have rag piles all over the place.  One big one, and a bunch of small ones at places I always need them.

The only new stuff I've bought lately are work clothes, because my old ones got so crummy and worn out they belonged in the rag pile.  (As reported before), I got a new Carhartt work coat, but it's just too nice to take out and get grease and oil on.  And the old one is still hanging on, and more comfortable.

I virtually never dress up anymore.  Nice jeans and a long sleeve T is it.  And I like those Skecher step in shoes you don't have to bend over to put on.