Tuesday Teasers...... early edition

[kiwi#9582]

Several days ago as I left a meeting at our church, I desperately gave myself a personal pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing

Suddenly I realized, I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot. My wife, Diane, has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. Her theory is that the car will be stolen. As I burst through the doors of the church, I came to a terrifying conclusion. Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty.

I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen. Then I made the most difficult call of all, “Honey,” I stammered. I always call her “honey” in times like these. “I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen.”

There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard Diane’s voice. “Ken” she barked, “I dropped you off!” Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, “Well, come and get me.” Diane retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your car?”

[da prez]

We were out doing errands with my wife and mother-in-law (93). We usually took her in the stores with us if we were going to be a long time. On one quick jaunt, we left her in the car with the engine running to keep the old girl warm. We got back to a stolen car. To make matters worse, they left her sitting in her wheel chair in the parking spot , and LEO was writing a parking ticket for an expired parking meter.  I did not mind the car being stoled, but leaving her and not our groceries, T H A T ' S  low.
                                            da prez

[MacDragon]

HaHaHa... I don't know why, but Prez's post reminded me of Ron White's "Tater Salad" when he says; " My wife's parents are L-L-L-Loaded... and they hate my G-G-G-Guts... and I can't wait for them to D-D-D-Die... cuz when they do... you'll never see my fat azz again"

[kiwi#9582]

Four thousand comedians out of work.....  and half of them are on the Valk board!!!!