How do you NOT fart when you're in bed?
Everyone farts.
My wife and I fart around each other when the need arises. We been married 21 years.
Jabba
Well, the answer to that is obvious but I'll say it anyway; you're both asleep and have no control over it. However you do under nearly all other circumstances. And yes...again the obvious, everyone does it and many claim it's a natural body function so why be so uptight about it? It's not a matter of being "uptight" but a matter of respect for the other person(s) near you. As with many other things in life....a person's right to let go stops at the end of my nose(or ears if you are under 50 and half deaf). As I suggested to one person in my office a few years before I retired; try letting go just once while you're in court. So this dipstick did just that in an effort to prove his point to me....cost him $500 for a contempt of court charge. He lost the case....and his argument that passing gas was a natural body function and shouldn't cost him. So the judge, with a wry smile on his face, asked for a show of hands by anyone within the first row if they were revulsed by the "natural body function." Hands went up for three rows back, the judge rapped his gavel and the att'y. shut up and sat down. The judge then moved for a 30 min. recess, adding "for the personal benefit of all those needing a breath of fresh air and for Mr. XXX to take care of business." The courtroom came unglued with that last remark. I often wondered if the court steno actually recorded it since it was after the gavel came down.
Now....moving on to a less odoriferous subject.
