The will. :)

[John Schmidt]

Mr. Durwood is on his deathbed and he knows the end is near.
His nurse, his wife, his daughter and 2 sons, are with him.
He says to them:

"Paul, I want you to take the Shaughnessy houses."

"Valerie, take the condos over in Coal Harbor and False Creek."

"Mike, I want you to take the offices over in the City Centre."

"Mildred, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings in Point Grey."

The nurse is just blown away by all this, and, as Mr. Durwood slips away, she says, "Mrs. Durwood, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have accumulated all this property!"

Mildred replies, "Property?...The Old Fart had a paper route!"

[FloridaValkRyder]