More political humor! Things you have to believe to be a Republican....

[Scanner]

Things you have to believe to be a Republican today:

Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing UN resolutions against Iraq.

A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our longtime allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense.

A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness, and you need our prayers for your recovery.



Friends don't let friends vote Republican. 

[fiddle mike]

I believe it was the Left that leaned on Turkey, one of our last real allies, in attempt to  make them feel the neurotic guilt of white Democrats.  It is kind of funny that the leader of the free world supports Latin American Marxists, though.

I'm not sure what the Feds have to do with marriage, the States purview, but it's my experience that homosexuals would rather have a few in DC dictate policy to the many at home. That's not Jeffersonian democracy, but more of the Chinese model the Clintons subscribe to.

And yeah, Jesus don't like Hillary, Janet Reno or anyone else that deals in political murder.

[Davemn]

So Scanner......not sure why this was so important to post on this site. Maybe you just like to see yourself in print. Hmmmm. Did you make those up yourself?

[RoadKill]

Well DAMN! I guess that means that ,by your definition, most here are not Republicans....unless disagreeing with the demonrats automatically qualifies. 

[HotRod]

Things you have to believe to be a Republican today:

Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing UN resolutions against Iraq.

A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our longtime allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense.

A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness, and you need our prayers for your recovery.



Friends don't let friends vote Republican. 

Hey Scanner, why don't you take your political rhetoric to that type of board,I think your just here Solly for a rant, I m not sure you even have a motorcycle, anyone can post a picture of the Valkyrie banner. Take it somewhere where someone might give a chit what you have to say. I'm just saying,your a trouble maker.

[Scanner]

LMAO.....u guys are hilarious!  Sure like to give but not much for receiving are u?

Yeah, I'm here "solly" for a rant....

[fstsix]

Scanner don't let snow gather to high at your door 

[JimL]

Oh come on guys where is your sense of humor!!  Step back, take a deep breath and be totally honest, this board would not be nearly as interesting if we didn't have Scanner, Puffs Daddy and Strong Eagle posting their viewpoints.

[RoadKill]

Oh come on guys where is your sense of humor!!  Step back, take a deep breath and be totally honest, this board would not be nearly as interesting if we didn't have Scanner, Puffs Daddy and Strong Eagle posting their viewpoints.

+1 ! It is nice to hear the other point of view from some one that can actually debate it intelligently...Even if they are WRONG ! ! LOL

Keep dishing it out boys...we can take it. 

[Scanner]

 

[QOTFU]

LMAO.....u guys are hilarious!  Sure like to give but not much for receiving are u?

Yeah, I'm here "solly" for a rant....

So if somebody pipes up and says what they believe that means that they can't take it? Hmmmmm..........that has the scent of socialism

[Scanner]

LMAO.....u guys are hilarious!  Sure like to give but not much for receiving are u?

Yeah, I'm here "solly" for a rant....

So if somebody pipes up and says what they believe that means that they can't take it? Hmmmmm..........that has the scent of socialism

uh...socialism?  uh...ok

[Novavalker]

Anti-Democrat Humor	powered by Aeva

[Willow]

Hey Scanner, why don't you take your political rhetoric to that type of board,I think your just here Solly for a rant, I m not sure you even have a motorcycle, anyone can post a picture of the Valkyrie banner. Take it somewhere where someone might give a chit what you have to say. I'm just saying,your a trouble maker.

Scanner does have a motorcycle and it's a Valkyrie.

I think (at least I hope) the point he was trying to make was that posts ridiculing the viewpoints of liberals are offensive to a large postion of the VRCC community.  Perhaps a few of you who took offense at this post will get the message.

Honestly what sounds ridiculous to one political faction makes perfect sense to another side.  It goes both ways.  What makes America so interesting is that both sides of the political schism contain some very intelligent people who are absolutely certain that anyone who can agree with the other side must have his head up his ass.

If anyone thinks we're ruled by the majority in the good old U.S.A, I have a news flash for you.  The country is almost evenly divided between committed conservatives and committed liberals.  Each national, and most local, election is determined by a small uncommitted group in the middle.

Give it a rest, guys.  If you're going to dish it out you need to prepare yourself to take it just as well.

[Chillerman]

Hey Scanner, why don't you take your political rhetoric to that type of board,I think your just here Solly for a rant, I m not sure you even have a motorcycle, anyone can post a picture of the Valkyrie banner. Take it somewhere where someone might give a chit what you have to say. I'm just saying,your a trouble maker.

Gee Rod, you make it sound like you have to be a conservative Republican (which I am) to make a political post on this board.  There are sure a lot of liberal bashing posts that you don't seem to have a problem with.  I happened to think Scanners post was funny! What's good for the goose...............

[franco6]

thank you willow! yes there are more than one side to every story
thank you Scanner !we had a good laugh!!!

[Hellcat]

Good work Scanner.

[FryeVRCCDS0067]

Scanner, although I virtually never share your viewpoint I always enjoy your posts. Thanks for makin’ me think and helping to keep life interesting. May we all, always enjoy the ability to laugh at ourselves.

[Jabba]

Then toss in someone totally irreverant like me, that dislikes BOTH the Reps and Dems.  Scanner, I enjoy the banter.  Like everyone else... when it gets all personal, it's not fun anymore.  Everyone should hold the personal attacks. 

Me... I want ALL the entrenched infection in DC gone, and most of the entrenched puss in every state flushed out as well.  We keep voting like we vote, and we're gonna keep getting the feces we've been getting. 

Personally, I think that the Reps and the Dems meet after hours... at least in spirit, and hoist a glass and toast the short sightedness of the American people.

I think we can only take SO much... and personally I am at my limit.  Something HAS to change.  Neither existing party is doing the country ANY good.  Please see that and help me fix it.

Jabba

[HotRod]

Hey Scanner, why don't you take your political rhetoric to that type of board,I think your just here Solly for a rant, I m not sure you even have a motorcycle, anyone can post a picture of the Valkyrie banner. Take it somewhere where someone might give a chit what you have to say. I'm just saying,your a trouble maker.

Gee Rod, you make it sound like you have to be a conservative Republican (which I am) to make a political post on this board.  There are sure a lot of liberal bashing posts that you don't seem to have a problem with.  I happened to think Scanners post was funny! What's good for the goose...............

No, I don't really care what you are,I just get tired of someone just constantly trying to get a rise out of people on this board. I thought,but I could be wrong,that this was a motorcycle board? Anyways, you have a good day and I hope you get some riding in.

[JimL]

No, I don't really care what you are,I just get tired of someone just constantly trying to get a rise out of people on this board. I thought,but I could be wrong,that this was a motorcycle board? Anyways, you have a good day and I hope you get some riding in.

Rod I agree that there are those that try to get a rise out of folks on this board, lord knows I have taken the bait many times!  I have to admit that the post yesterday for the first 30 seconds really raised my blood pressure a bit, then I stepped back and thought to myself..."I don't agree with this stuff...but this is some funny sh*t"!  By the way, I intend to do just that...get some riding in today!

[fstsix]

I have also walked away from both parties Scanner brother i too enjoy your post keep them going.almost pissed myself after your post but very entertaining I must admit but I am not thinned skin.I think when bush agreed to let first stimulus stay on table just to be Bipartisan, I thought 90 or so more days he could have hung he might have almost been conservative but caved in and now look what has been spread.Well lets enjoy the Internet before this new Dictator shuts it DOWN. Free speech is awesome!!..

[JimL]

Then toss in someone totally irreverant like me, that dislikes BOTH the Reps and Dems.  Scanner, I enjoy the banter.  Like everyone else... when it gets all personal, it's not fun anymore.  Everyone should hold the personal attacks. 

Me... I want ALL the entrenched infection in DC gone, and most of the entrenched puss in every state flushed out as well.  We keep voting like we vote, and we're gonna keep getting the feces we've been getting. 

Personally, I think that the Reps and the Dems meet after hours... at least in spirit, and hoist a glass and toast the short sightedness of the American people.

I think we can only take SO much... and personally I am at my limit.  Something HAS to change.  Neither existing party is doing the country ANY good.  Please see that and help me fix it.

Jabba

Jabba I really enjoy reading your perspectives.  I think that you and I have very similar perspectives on how we look at the role of government fiscally and the role of government in our personal lives.  I think strategically we agree on the "what and why", however we disagree tactically on the "how".

[John Schmidt]

Yes, I also took it for what it was....humorous, and it was that. If taken item by item, a dissertation on each from both sides of the aisle would fill volumes. Some years ago, we had an elderly neighbor lady that was a "dyed-in-the-wool" democrat and she and I used to have some real spirited discussions. She had a marvelous background, having worked in foreign service in embassies all over the world most of her adult life. That in itself was unheard of for a single female back in her day. Right after Watergate, she was railing against "those damnable Republicans" and I really got her goat when I told her the biggest difference between the Democrats and Republicans was the Democrats didn't get caught. So, in retaliation she got up from her chair, walked over to me and kissed me on the cheek, then took away the big piece of rhubarb/strawberry pie she has just served me. With that, I quickly apologized....she was a marvelous baker. One election year, in the middle of the night I had picked up a large elephant sign from somewhere and stuck it in the middle of her front yard. After she found it, she left a phone message while I was at work that just said "beware."  About three days later, I came across this bumper sticker that went the full length of my rear bumper that said in bright red letters "DEMOCRATS RULE, REPUBLICANS DROOL."  I had been driving all over Orlando for three days with that on the car and didn't know it. After a good laugh, I gave her a hug whereupon she told me that made it all worth it....her husband had passed away a few years earlier. She finally died at 92, taking her spirit with her. Really miss that old gal, especially her reaction when I showed her my voter registration card one day; Democrat. I've since gone Independent but actually wish voter registration didn't have to have any party choice, I've never voted a straight ticket in my life and I think anyone that does is missing the boat.

[JimL]

Yes, I also took it for what it was....humorous, and it was that. If taken item by item, a dissertation on each from both sides of the aisle would fill volumes. Some years ago, we had an elderly neighbor lady that was a "dyed-in-the-wool" democrat and she and I used to have some real spirited discussions. She had a marvelous background, having worked in foreign service in embassies all over the world most of her adult life. That in itself was unheard of for a single female back in her day. Right after Watergate, she was railing against "those damnable Republicans" and I really got her goat when I told her the biggest difference between the Democrats and Republicans was the Democrats didn't get caught. So, in retaliation she got up from her chair, walked over to me and kissed me on the cheek, then took away the big piece of rhubarb/strawberry pie she has just served me. With that, I quickly apologized....she was a marvelous baker. One election year, in the middle of the night I had picked up a large elephant sign from somewhere and stuck it in the middle of her front yard. After she found it, she left a phone message while I was at work that just said "beware."  About three days later, I came across this bumper sticker that went the full length of my rear bumper that said in bright red letters "DEMOCRATS RULE, REPUBLICANS DROOL."  I had been driving all over Orlando for three days with that on the car and didn't know it. After a good laugh, I gave her a hug whereupon she told me that made it all worth it....her husband had passed away a few years earlier. She finally died at 92, taking her spirit with her. Really miss that old gal, especially her reaction when I showed her my voter registration card one day; Democrat. I've since gone Independent but actually wish voter registration didn't have to have any party choice, I've never voted a straight ticket in my life and I think anyone that does is missing the boat.

Excellent story John, thanks for sharing.

[Jabba]

That's the great thing about America is that it's OK to have different views, tactics, and goals.

I love America.  I want to keep it.  I do not want my wealth redistributed by ANYONE.  Not Reps nor Dems.  Sink or swim.  If you don't want to work... you shouldn't get to ride.  Too many people riding the cart and not enough of us pulling it anymore.

Jabba

[x]

Hey Scanner, why don't you take your political rhetoric to that type of board,I think your just here Solly for a rant, I m not sure you even have a motorcycle, anyone can post a picture of the Valkyrie banner. Take it somewhere where someone might give a chit what you have to say. I'm just saying,your a trouble maker.

Gee Rod, you make it sound like you have to be a conservative Republican (which I am) to make a political post on this board.  There are sure a lot of liberal bashing posts that you don't seem to have a problem with.  I happened to think Scanners post was funny! What's good for the goose...............

No, I don't really care what you are,I just get tired of someone just constantly trying to get a rise out of people on this board. I thought,but I could be wrong,that this was a motorcycle board? Anyways, you have a good day and I hope you get some riding in.

Gee, Rod... you've been strangely silent when someone posts a picture of Obama looking like an African chieftain.  Silent again, too, with Tom T's new preamble to the Constitution.  Silent yet again when Obama is compared to a dark beer.  And nary a peep from you about the Obama fan club post.  And how about "political poll - sorry yet?"  Haven't seen you complain about that one, either.

So Rod... tell me... are the people that made those posts... are they "constantly trying to get a rise out of people on this board."?  Is there a difference between those posts and Scanner's post?  Or are your panties in a wad because Scanner posted something that you don't agree with?  Wazzup, Rod?

PS:  Rod... it is a motorcycle board... with a wide variety of topics... even ones you don't like.  And before you ask, Rod... yes... I have a Valkyrie... I ride it almost everyday... only when I am not in Singapore does it stay parked... it's my third Valk, Rod.

[Scanner]

By the way, that was the first political thread I have ever started here.  Posted lots of responses to others though.

Just thought I'd see the reaction when someone posted something other than what the 5 or 6 people who continuously post right wing political threads here usually toss out...I must say I'm a little surprised at the positive (or at least accepting) response from some.  Some of you guys are a lot more thoughtful and less reactionary than I suspected ...a bit of an eye opener for me too. Appreciate it.

[Hoser]

Your original post describes me perfectly!     hoser

[fudgie]

Then toss in someone totally irreverant like me, that dislikes BOTH the Reps and Dems.  Scanner, I enjoy the banter.  Like everyone else... when it gets all personal, it's not fun anymore.  Everyone should hold the personal attacks. 

Me... I want ALL the entrenched infection in DC gone, and most of the entrenched puss in every state flushed out as well.  We keep voting like we vote, and we're gonna keep getting the feces we've been getting. 

Personally, I think that the Reps and the Dems meet after hours... at least in spirit, and hoist a glass and toast the short sightedness of the American people.

I think we can only take SO much... and personally I am at my limit.  Something HAS to change.  Neither existing party is doing the country ANY good.  Please see that and help me fix it.

Jabba

[BamaJack]

Scanner does have a motorcycle and it's a Valkyrie.

I think (at least I hope) the point he was trying to make was that posts ridiculing the viewpoints of liberals are offensive to a large postion of the VRCC community.  Perhaps a few of you who took offense at this post will get the message.

Honestly what sounds ridiculous to one political faction makes perfect sense to another side.  It goes both ways.  What makes America so interesting is that both sides of the political schism contain some very intelligent people who are absolutely certain that anyone who can agree with the other side must have his head up his ass.

If anyone thinks we're ruled by the majority in the good old U.S.A, I have a news flash for you.  The country is almost evenly divided between committed conservatives and committed liberals.  Each national, and most local, election is determined by a small uncommitted group in the middle.

Give it a rest, guys.  If you're going to dish it out you need to prepare yourself to take it just as well.

That bears repeating! On both the Right and the Left the vast majority of voters go into the booth and vote the party line... they just check Republican of Democrat and call it good. And there is not usually much homework done on the candidates either... they're in your party, they must be good.

[Ghillie]

Conservative I am, and I appreciate the fact that the majority of my Valk brethren are as committed to the ideals set by our founding fathers as I am. But for all the posts that go up here espousing our ideals, I can't fault Scanner or any other mentally ill individual for espousing an opposing viewpoint. They certainly don't deserve to be told to get lost.

As for all the duly elected representatives we have sent to DC: since Kill them all and let God sort them out is not yet a viable option, I would settle for Impeach em all and start the hell over. Not sure if it's the air of the water there, but common sense, fiscal responsibility, and logic all seem to get drained right out of someone as soon as they get there.

[Skinhead]

+1

[HotRod]

No, I don't really care what you are,I just get tired of someone just constantly trying to get a rise out of people on this board. I thought,but I could be wrong,that this was a motorcycle board? Anyways, you have a good day and I hope you get some riding in.

Rod I agree that there are those that try to get a rise out of folks on this board, lord knows I have taken the bait many times!  I have to admit that the post yesterday for the first 30 seconds really raised my blood pressure a bit, then I stepped back and thought to myself..."I don't agree with this stuff...but this is some funny sh*t"!  By the way, I intend to do just that...get some riding in today!

I totally hear ya Jim, good advise,thanks.

[HotRod]

By the way, that was the first political thread I have ever started here.  Posted lots of responses to others though.

Just thought I'd see the reaction when someone posted something other than what the 5 or 6 people who continuously post right wing political threads here usually toss out...I must say I'm a little surprised at the positive (or at least accepting) response from some.  Some of you guys are a lot more thoughtful and less reactionary than I suspected ...a bit of an eye opener for me too. Appreciate it.

Hey Scanner I apologize if I offended you,did not mean to and I had a long day at work when I read your post and probably reacted a little quicker then I normally would have. I don't post political crap but sometimes respond. Carry on brother. Actually I thought you were just some other political junkie that found a wonderful board to set up shop for while, carry on brother even if you are wrong.

[John Schmidt]

......I can't fault Scanner or any other mentally ill individual for espousing an opposing viewpoint.

The insinuation I feel is uncalled for. Granted, I don't agree with some statements made by him and others, but to infer someone as being "mentally ill??" Ghillie, maybe I took it the wrong way, hope so because that doesn't sound like you.

[f6john]

......I can't fault Scanner or any other mentally ill individual for espousing an opposing viewpoint.

The insinuation I feel is uncalled for. Granted, I don't agree with some statements made by him and others, but to infer someone as being "mentally ill??" Ghillie, maybe I took it the wrong way, hope so because that doesn't sound like you.

 Not to worry John, Scanner can dish it out too. He's pretty good with the comeback's. We all take this stuff too seriously for this medium anyway, if we were face to face it would be so much easier to understand the persons intent.

[Chillerman]

Hey Scanner, why don't you take your political rhetoric to that type of board,I think your just here Solly for a rant, I m not sure you even have a motorcycle, anyone can post a picture of the Valkyrie banner. Take it somewhere where someone might give a chit what you have to say. I'm just saying,your a trouble maker.

Gee Rod, you make it sound like you have to be a conservative Republican (which I am) to make a political post on this board.  There are sure a lot of liberal bashing posts that you don't seem to have a problem with.  I happened to think Scanners post was funny! What's good for the goose...............

No, I don't really care what you are,I just get tired of someone just constantly trying to get a rise out of people on this board. I thought,but I could be wrong,that this was a motorcycle board? Anyways, you have a good day and I hope you get some riding in.

Gee, Rod... you've been strangely silent when someone posts a picture of Obama looking like an African chieftain.  Silent again, too, with Tom T's new preamble to the Constitution.  Silent yet again when Obama is compared to a dark beer.  And nary a peep from you about the Obama fan club post.  And how about "political poll - sorry yet?"  Haven't seen you complain about that one, either.

So Rod... tell me... are the people that made those posts... are they "constantly trying to get a rise out of people on this board."?  Is there a difference between those posts and Scanner's post?  Or are your panties in a wad because Scanner posted something that you don't agree with?  Wazzup, Rod?

PS:  Rod... it is a motorcycle board... with a wide variety of topics... even ones you don't like.  And before you ask, Rod... yes... I have a Valkyrie... I ride it almost everyday... only when I am not in Singapore does it stay parked... it's my third Valk, Rod.

OH, NO!!!  When did you come back??   And why did you leave?

[HotRod]

Hey Scanner, why don't you take your political rhetoric to that type of board,I think your just here Solly for a rant, I m not sure you even have a motorcycle, anyone can post a picture of the Valkyrie banner. Take it somewhere where someone might give a chit what you have to say. I'm just saying,your a trouble maker.

Gee Rod, you make it sound like you have to be a conservative Republican (which I am) to make a political post on this board.  There are sure a lot of liberal bashing posts that you don't seem to have a problem with.  I happened to think Scanners post was funny! What's good for the goose...............

No, I don't really care what you are,I just get tired of someone just constantly trying to get a rise out of people on this board. I thought,but I could be wrong,that this was a motorcycle board? Anyways, you have a good day and I hope you get some riding in.

Gee, Rod... you've been strangely silent when someone posts a picture of Obama looking like an African chieftain.  Silent again, too, with Tom T's new preamble to the Constitution.  Silent yet again when Obama is compared to a dark beer.  And nary a peep from you about the Obama fan club post.  And how about "political poll - sorry yet?"  Haven't seen you complain about that one, either.

So Rod... tell me... are the people that made those posts... are they "constantly trying to get a rise out of people on this board."?  Is there a difference between those posts and Scanner's post?  Or are your panties in a wad because Scanner posted something that you don't agree with?  Wazzup, Rod?

PS:  Rod... it is a motorcycle board... with a wide variety of topics... even ones you don't like.  And before you ask, Rod... yes... I have a Valkyrie... I ride it almost everyday... only when I am not in Singapore does it stay parked... it's my third Valk, Rod.

OH, NO!!!  When did you come back??   And why did you leave?

Dont worry about it!

[Chillerman]

Sorry for the confusion Rod, I was quoting Strong Eagle, not you.  He has been gone for quite a while and now he is back.