Simple home remedies

[Patrick]

THESE REALLY WORK!! I checked these out on Snopes and they are for real!
...


AMAZING, SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES:

1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE
ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU
CHOP.

2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY
USING THE SINK.

3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.

4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM  ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.

5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

6. YOU NEED ONLY TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.


7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL
PROBLEM.


THOUGHT for the day:

SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD
FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN THEY'RE PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.

SOME ADDITIONAL ADVICE: NEVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, TAKE A LAXATIVE AND SLEEPING PILLS ON THE SAME NIGHT.


"Life is a precious gift, enjoy it while you can.
Life is a coin, you can spend it anyway you wish, but you can only spend it once"
 
 

[Mr Whiskey]

5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

Made me LOL, thanks

[specialdose]

 

    Thanks Patrick, 2nd good laugh  I got from the forum today

[Hook#3287]

 

[RP#62]

I've also heard that if you eat a live toad for breakfast, nothing worse will happen to you all day.

-RP

[da prez]

 Told my wife "If you put your bra on backwards and it fits better , better stay home.


       PATRICK , You need to get out and ride

                                      da prez

[da prez]

 Told my wife "If you put your bra on backwards and it fits better , better stay home.


       PATRICK , You need to get out and ride

                                      da prez

[Hooter]

Wonder what happened to the one about chapped lips? Spread some cow crap on em and you won't lick em? Snopes is slippin......