Yeah, I'm expecting visitors...

[Daniel Meyer]

http://lifeisaroad.com/blog/2015/08/06/4091/

Possibly with straight jackets...

[Serk]

Cut the cord and go with Hulu or Netflix (Or Torrent sites)...

(Yeah, I know, then you've still gotta deal with crap from the internet companies, but it's one less set of 'em at least.)

And excellent Southpark refernce, btw!

[The emperor has no clothes]

  good luck tomorrow. If we don't hear from you we'll know where you're at. 

[Jess from VA]

Yeah, I've had the old.... unhook and hook back up the cables before.

Instead of the drama, I tell them I already did it and it didn't fix nothin'.

Verizon FIOS fiber optics is a great service.  But whoa is he who ever actually needs to talk to a human being, that remains a big PITA.  

After all the up-sell, special, one time only, yada sales pitches, I asked... you keep notes on me in my account folder, right?  Yes, we do.  OK, open up my notes and type this in..... this customer is not interested in any promotion of any kind UNLESS IT CAUSES HIS MONTHLY BILL TO GO DOWN.

I don't think we have any promotions like that sir.

NO kidding, well then I am not interested in any promotions.

Now, about the problem with my remote and the battery backup beeping at me all day and night, which is what I was calling about....

[biguglyman]

I interrupt them as early as I can in the script and tell them I want to talk to a level 2 technician. That gets me past all the "do you have a router" etc. bs and lets me talk to someone who knows I know what I'm doing.

[old2soon]

I just KNEW there was/is a reason I got rid of the satellite/cable/pay service.  When I did call the first thing I DEMANDED was some one whose first language is English.  THEN I told them-lets cut to the chase-put the tech on before I recite the litany of B/S cause I only intend to do that ONCE. AND if this requires any more than me pushing buttons on the remote get your repair person out here as I'm paying too cursed much for what I'm getting anyhow. Want some REAL fun?? TRY to cancel your service!  All of a sudden they have deals to keep you that they DID NOT offer when you signed up.  STILL NOT missing any pay service.  RIDE SAFE.