Awkward Parenting Moment (Non-Valk original story)

[Serk]

Very awkward parenting moment: This weekend I was at Wal Mart with Blake. Towards the end of the shopping extravaganza I made the fatal error of going down the Halloween costume isle. He's long said he wanted to be Spider man so I was looking at Spider man costumes. He pointed at a Star Wars Stormtrooper costume that came with a rifle and said he wanted that now instead of Spider man. I told him no, he's said for ages he wants to be Spider man, I'm not gonna just change it right now we'll talk about it later, etc. etc. etc.
So, I start walking away with him and that's where the awkwardness comes in. He starts screaming in that carrying tone that only a four year old can truly master "I WANNA BE THE WHITE MAN WITH A GUN!!!!!" over and over and over...
I got some VERY odd looks, while trying to calm him down and explain that it's a Stormtrooper, not a "WHITE MAN WITH A GUN!" as he kept yelling...

Yeah... parenting... gotta love it...

[Moonshot_1]

"I WANNA BE THE WHITE MAN WITH A GUN!!!!!"

Don't we all. Don't we all.

[Robert]

Love it those moments that you laugh about a bit down the road. Thanks that was good.

[The emperor has no clothes]

  Reminds me of a story when I was 5 in Alabama.

[Bighead]

Reminds me of a story when I was 5 in Alabama.

Hey I am still the white man with a gun and in Alabama don't knock it.

[The emperor has no clothes]

Reminds me of a story when I was 5 in Alabama.

Hey I am still the white man with a gun and in Alabama don't knock it.

Not knocking it. But do be careful what you say around kids. 

[old2soon]

I have a suggestion BUT I'm kinda od fashioned. RIDE SAFE.

[John Schmidt]

I have a suggestion BUT I'm kinda od fashioned. RIDE SAFE.

Yeah Dennis, me too and I'll bet I know what it is.   After one episode, my girls knew better than to test mom or dad....especially mom. Only last week my wife and I went out to eat, there was a couple with three kids and all were screeching and running all over the place. Even the youngest was more than old enough to know better. My four girls would go in, sit down, and behave. They weren't abused by any definition, but knew how to conduct themselves and when to let off steam. Now, their ages would have ranged from 47-57, and I have had some good chuckles just watching how they handled their kids in similar situations.

Not meant as criticism, just relating experience. I'm well aware it can be quite embarrassing. 

[Serk]

All 4 of my kids are VERY experienced with and have a great respect for "The NONO" (Which is a wooden spoon.)

However, I prefer to apply it afterwards, and not in the middle of the store.

(After my dad was a bit... over zealous with physical punishment against me I established one of my own personal rules is that I will not apply physical punishment when I'm mad, only when I'm calm and thinking rationally will it be done.)

This case might have warranted it if he hadn't made me laugh so much.

[Hooter]

Awkward moment(s), I think we have all had em with our kids. Back in the day we would have gotten our asses whacked right there and no one woulda given it a second thought.  But, due to society being the way it is the  would have been there before you got outa the store. Like you said, you talked about it later and I hope he understands.

[Gavin_Sons]

Spankings happen in my family the second they act up or are being bad. Like screaming in a store. If you wait til later they forget what they have done and I feel bad. So if my boys need it they get it in the middle of the restraunt or store. Most of the time all i have to do is give them "the look" and they know i'm mad, other times it takes a little smack on the rear to get their attention. If they do something that makes me laugh they get a free pass. Make dad laugh get off scott free.

[John Schmidt]

Aahh....the wooden spoon! My dad's favorite appliance. I remember one time when I knew it was coming I sneaked a tin pie plate in my jeans. The first whack produced a loud "pwaaang" but only one, he merely dropped a bit lower and finished the job. I agree, the middle of the store isn't always the best place. I often settled it later but only when the girls were old enough to actually remember what I was talking about.

One of my gals much later in life found a squirt gun quite effective when one of her boys acted up. She started carrying one in her purse and if one(had three) created a scene, he'd get a face full right there.  I guess the shock was the effect that made them pause long enough for her to grab his shirt and get in his face. I watched it one time, was actually quite funny. 

[G-Man]

Great story that will provide laughs for the rest of your lives. 

 

[therapist]

I have come to believe that physical punishment is a tool for the lazy parent.
There are more creative ways to parent, and they don't have to result in
spoiled, misbehaved children. It's more work, but the result is, your kids
respect you instead of fearing you. JMO

[Serk]

I have come to believe that physical punishment is a tool for the lazy parent.
There are more creative ways to parent, and they don't have to result in
spoiled, misbehaved children. It's more work, but the result is, your kids
respect you instead of fearing you. JMO

I believe in a sliding and balanced scale of starting with non-physical and moving to physical as the non-physical punishments fail. I don't go straight to the spoon, but the spoon is there when time outs, talking to's, taking away privileges etc. fail. I also believe in a sliding scale rewarding positive behavior.

And I don't think it's physically possible for a parent of 4 year old triplets and a teenage daughter to be lazy...

[Hooter]

I believe in a verbal warning, 1. This counting to 3 and all that goes with that kind of so called punishment is a crock. The ol don't do that and then the parents ignore the kid after the verbal warning grinds me. Or, the parents just let the kids run without intervention.    I loved and respected my parents but they spared no horsepower when it came to discipline. Even do something wrong in the neighborhood and you are apt to get your ass whipped by a neighbor. Then a phone call was made to your folks. Then when you get home  you got it again. No one called the law.
Its NOT against the law to spank your kids!!!! You can't beat them, but you can sure as hell spank em. A swat on the hind end never hurt anyone.

[DirtyDan]

White men with guns

That's how America was made

Love it

Dan

[The emperor has no clothes]

I have come to believe that physical punishment is a tool for the lazy parent.
There are more creative ways to parent, and they don't have to result in
spoiled, misbehaved children. It's more work, but the result is, your kids
respect you instead of fearing you. JMO

I believe in a sliding and balanced scale of starting with non-physical and moving to physical as the non-physical punishments fail. I don't go straight to the spoon, but the spoon is there when time outs, talking to's, taking away privileges etc. fail. I also believe in a sliding scale rewarding positive behavior.

And I don't think it's physically possible for a parent of 4 year old triplets and a teenage daughter to be lazy...

Your parenting skills sound just fine, and I can't imagine that either of you is lazy. 

[Jess from VA]

At least he wasn't screaming he wanted the Wonder Woman or Tinkerbell costume. 

[RDAbull]

I have come to believe that physical punishment is a tool for the lazy parent.
There are more creative ways to parent, and they don't have to result in
spoiled, misbehaved children. It's more work, but the result is, your kids
respect you instead of fearing you. JMO

To me it is quite apparent that most of the parents of this upcoming generation are not worth a crap at either type of parental governance.  This next generation seems to me to be lacking in respect,  self-respect and courtesy.  Time outs and lecturing are just not working.

[GeoffreyB]

Serk,

Thank you for the laugh.

One suggestion for "middle of the store" dealings with your offspring.  Heard it from an older guy I worked with before I had kids, and implemented it when my boys got to walking age.  Liked the idea of short-stopping unacceptable behavior without having to raise my voice or cause a scene.  Started doing it at home, so their first experience wasn't in public.

After they've been warned the first time, or if they start to get loud and misbehave, simply grab the top part of their nearest ear, and "lift" enough that they barely don't have to come up on their toes.  At this point, you have their undivided attention.  Bend down, or get on your knees so they are eye to eye with you - they can't look away or move without imparting some serious pain upon themselves.  If they are being loud, your soft-talking will force them to be quiet so they can hear you speak.

I would calmly explain to them that their current behavior was unacceptable, and they could CHOOSE to behave properly (lower their voice, keep hands to themselves, tell me what they were upset about, ect), or they could CHOOSE to continue to misbehave and there would be immediate repercussions (leaving for home, and having a meeting with "the spoon").  Because they knew Dad doesn't say things without delivering, I never had to leave for home.

I'm a big fan of Love and Logic parenting, immediate and appropriate repercussions, and a little bit of drill sergeant thrown in for good measure.

Kids should have a HEALTHY fear of God and Dad - in that order.   

[RP#62]

When my two boys were little, if they were bad, I'd usually just spank them whereas my wife would sit them down and give them a long talk about why what they did was bad, and how it made other people feel, and so on and so on.  Well, anyway, one day they both did something bad - I don't even remember what, but my wife had them both upstairs sitting on the bed, they were both sniffling with tears in their eyes and she was about 10 minutes into the talk when I walked in.  She continued the talk and finally, the little one interrupted her and asked "Can dad just spank us?"  We both lost it.

-RP

[FryeVRCCDS0067]

That's a riot!

[Varmintmist]

Thats one of those times when you CANT laugh because it would re enforce the behavior, but you want to sooooooooo badly.

As to spanking, I found with my son that there is a direct neural link from his butt to his brain. If you would tell him something, it would go in one ear and just float around sometimes until you re established the pathway.